Kalki Subramaniam is a vibrant force in the world of transgender rights, art, and activism, a true trailblazer from Tamil Nadu, India. She’s a storyteller at heart, weaving her fierce spirit into everything she does: from founding the groundbreaking Sahodari Foundation that champions transgender visibility and empowerment, to publishing Sahodari, the first Tamil magazine created by and for transgender women. Born in the small town of Pollachi, Kalki was always a bright student, holding two master’s degrees, in Journalism and International Relations, yet her real education came from living her truth in a society that often struggles to accept difference.
For over a decade, Kalki has blended activism with creativity, using art, film, and literature to tell stories that most wouldn’t dare tell. She made waves as the lead actress in the Tamil film Narthagi, breaking barriers as one of India’s first transgender women to star in a mainstream movie. More than just an artist and activist, Kalki is an entrepreneur with a heart, her projects often center on uplifting underprivileged transgender women, helping them find a voice and a livelihood. Her journey is about more than personal triumph; it’s about opening doors for others, challenging norms, and creating spaces where transgender people can thrive with dignity. Meeting Kalki feels like sitting down with a wise sister who’s lived through fire and come out shining, with stories that inspire courage and a vision that promises change.
Monika: Hello Kalki! It’s such a joy to finally speak with you. Even though we’re oceans apart, it feels like we share the same journey, the ups and downs, the battles and the triumphs of being transgender women.
Kalki: Namaste, Monika. The pleasure is all mine. It’s wonderful to connect with someone who truly understands the path we walk. Our stories may come from different corners of the world, but our hearts beat with the same courage.
Monika: You have been a tireless advocate for transgender legal rights in India for many years. Could you share with us some insight into the main goals and challenges of this movement?
Kalki: In the Indian Constitution, the fundamental rights under Part III are enforceable human rights guaranteed to all citizens of this country, whether men, women, or transgender people. We, transgender people, however, face discrimination in society because of our gender identity. Only legal recognition can ensure our rights. The state must develop policies that protect transgender people and implement measures to empower us.
Along these lines, I have been sensitizing the judiciary to gain a better understanding of transgender people’s lives and the issues we face in society. These campaigns, carried out alongside other transgender rights activists, will bring tremendous changes in the near future. It is crucial that legal recognition is accompanied by social awareness, so stigma and prejudice can be reduced. Our movement is about dignity, equality, and the right to live authentically. While progress is slow, every small victory brings hope to countless transgender individuals across India.
Monika: How would you describe the current status of transgender women in Indian society? Do you feel things are truly improving, or is there still a long road ahead?
Kalki: It is surely changing for the better in some states like Tamil Nadu and Karnataka. However, many states of India still are not safe places for transgender people to live, for example, Kerala. The state has 100% literacy but 0% tolerance when it comes to accepting transgender people and allowing them to live a dignified life.
Kalki: In the Indian Constitution, the fundamental rights under Part III are enforceable human rights guaranteed to all citizens of this country, whether men, women, or transgender people. We, transgender people, however, face discrimination in society because of our gender identity. Only legal recognition can ensure our rights. The state must develop policies that protect transgender people and implement measures to empower us.
Along these lines, I have been sensitizing the judiciary to gain a better understanding of transgender people’s lives and the issues we face in society. These campaigns, carried out alongside other transgender rights activists, will bring tremendous changes in the near future. It is crucial that legal recognition is accompanied by social awareness, so stigma and prejudice can be reduced. Our movement is about dignity, equality, and the right to live authentically. While progress is slow, every small victory brings hope to countless transgender individuals across India.
Monika: How would you describe the current status of transgender women in Indian society? Do you feel things are truly improving, or is there still a long road ahead?
Kalki: It is surely changing for the better in some states like Tamil Nadu and Karnataka. However, many states of India still are not safe places for transgender people to live, for example, Kerala. The state has 100% literacy but 0% tolerance when it comes to accepting transgender people and allowing them to live a dignified life.
India still has a long way to go in recognizing transgender people’s rights. I believe it will happen for sure in the coming years.
Social attitudes evolve slowly, and legal reforms need to be matched by greater public awareness. Many transgender women continue to face exclusion from education, employment, and healthcare. Yet, the courage and resilience shown by our community give me hope that change is inevitable.
Monika: Do you consider yourself politically active? Have you ever taken part in lobbying or advocacy campaigns? And more broadly, how do you see the role of transgender women in shaping the political landscape of India?
Kalki: I am not active in politics. I will enter politics when I want to. Transgender women can certainly make a difference in politics in a great way. We have gone through so much in life, and we certainly understand the pain and needs of the common man. We are better than anyone and should certainly come courageously to politics.
Monika: Do you consider yourself politically active? Have you ever taken part in lobbying or advocacy campaigns? And more broadly, how do you see the role of transgender women in shaping the political landscape of India?
Kalki: I am not active in politics. I will enter politics when I want to. Transgender women can certainly make a difference in politics in a great way. We have gone through so much in life, and we certainly understand the pain and needs of the common man. We are better than anyone and should certainly come courageously to politics.
Politics needs voices that represent all sections of society, and transgender women bring unique perspectives shaped by lived experience. Our presence can challenge stereotypes and push for inclusive policies that benefit everyone. I believe once we overcome fear and hesitation, we will emerge as powerful agents of change.
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| The woman I am. I sculpted me, designed my life, determined to be happy, caring and beautiful at heart. |
Monika: You have an impressive and growing list of films to your name. How has your journey as an actress unfolded, and what does success mean to you in the world of cinema?
Kalki: Narthaki fetched me an award and critical acclaim for my performance in the film. I don’t want to be a star, that is difficult. I want to be known as a good actress. If I do only three or four films in my entire life, I want to be remembered for my performance in those select films. For me, the quality of the work matters far more than quantity or fame. Acting is a form of expression that allows me to tell stories close to my heart and challenge social norms. I believe cinema has the power to change minds, and I want to contribute to that change through my roles.
Monika: Which directors, actresses, or films have inspired you most on your journey as an artist? Are there particular performances or stories that have deeply influenced your approach to acting?
Kalki: Maniratnam Sir has always been my favourite director. Savitri, Smita Patel, Sridevi, Rekha, Tabu, Suhasini, Genelia, Priyanka Chopra, Sandra Bullock, and Uma Thurman are all my inspirations when it comes to acting. Each of these artists brings a unique style and strength to their performances, which motivates me to explore different facets of my own craft. I admire how they portray complex emotions with authenticity and grace. Their work constantly reminds me that acting is not just about entertainment, it’s about touching lives and creating empathy.
Monika: Many critics argue that the contemporary film industry still offers limited opportunities for women to showcase their talents and tell their stories on a larger scale. Do you think this is especially true for Bollywood productions, or are there signs of change?
Kalki: Very true. In most Indian mainstream movies, women are used as decorative pieces of flesh. But it will change for the better, and the change is coming. At least it is already happening in Tamil films. Women are beginning to claim more meaningful roles, portraying strong, complex characters that break traditional stereotypes. The audience is also starting to appreciate stories from female perspectives more deeply. I am hopeful that Bollywood will soon follow this positive trend and open doors for more talented women.
Monika: Besides your work in acting and activism, you’re also a businesswoman. Could you tell us more about your entrepreneurial journey and what drives you in this field?
Kalki: My business, Brand Kalki Enterprises, is a small startup social enterprise that promotes handicrafts made by village craftsmen. I am still learning business and will have to learn more every day to be highly successful. Running this business allows me to support local artisans and preserve traditional crafts that might otherwise be forgotten. It’s deeply fulfilling to create opportunities for these talented communities while raising awareness about their work. I believe entrepreneurship can be a powerful tool for social change, and I’m excited to grow in this role.
Monika: You have experience as a journalist as well. How do you feel about the way transgender stories and characters have been portrayed so far in Indian films, newspapers, and literature? Are these depictions helping or hurting the community?
Kalki: Indian films have betrayed us by showing transgender people as negative or perverted characters. Fortunately, Indian journalists, whether in English or vernacular press, have been quite truthful and honest in their stories and news about transgender people. The media has played a big role in sensitizing the public in our battle for equality.
Kalki: Narthaki fetched me an award and critical acclaim for my performance in the film. I don’t want to be a star, that is difficult. I want to be known as a good actress. If I do only three or four films in my entire life, I want to be remembered for my performance in those select films. For me, the quality of the work matters far more than quantity or fame. Acting is a form of expression that allows me to tell stories close to my heart and challenge social norms. I believe cinema has the power to change minds, and I want to contribute to that change through my roles.
Monika: Which directors, actresses, or films have inspired you most on your journey as an artist? Are there particular performances or stories that have deeply influenced your approach to acting?
Kalki: Maniratnam Sir has always been my favourite director. Savitri, Smita Patel, Sridevi, Rekha, Tabu, Suhasini, Genelia, Priyanka Chopra, Sandra Bullock, and Uma Thurman are all my inspirations when it comes to acting. Each of these artists brings a unique style and strength to their performances, which motivates me to explore different facets of my own craft. I admire how they portray complex emotions with authenticity and grace. Their work constantly reminds me that acting is not just about entertainment, it’s about touching lives and creating empathy.
Monika: Many critics argue that the contemporary film industry still offers limited opportunities for women to showcase their talents and tell their stories on a larger scale. Do you think this is especially true for Bollywood productions, or are there signs of change?
Kalki: Very true. In most Indian mainstream movies, women are used as decorative pieces of flesh. But it will change for the better, and the change is coming. At least it is already happening in Tamil films. Women are beginning to claim more meaningful roles, portraying strong, complex characters that break traditional stereotypes. The audience is also starting to appreciate stories from female perspectives more deeply. I am hopeful that Bollywood will soon follow this positive trend and open doors for more talented women.
Monika: Besides your work in acting and activism, you’re also a businesswoman. Could you tell us more about your entrepreneurial journey and what drives you in this field?
Kalki: My business, Brand Kalki Enterprises, is a small startup social enterprise that promotes handicrafts made by village craftsmen. I am still learning business and will have to learn more every day to be highly successful. Running this business allows me to support local artisans and preserve traditional crafts that might otherwise be forgotten. It’s deeply fulfilling to create opportunities for these talented communities while raising awareness about their work. I believe entrepreneurship can be a powerful tool for social change, and I’m excited to grow in this role.
Monika: You have experience as a journalist as well. How do you feel about the way transgender stories and characters have been portrayed so far in Indian films, newspapers, and literature? Are these depictions helping or hurting the community?
Kalki: Indian films have betrayed us by showing transgender people as negative or perverted characters. Fortunately, Indian journalists, whether in English or vernacular press, have been quite truthful and honest in their stories and news about transgender people. The media has played a big role in sensitizing the public in our battle for equality.
I will always be thankful to the Indian journalists.
Still, there is much work to be done to bring more nuanced and respectful portrayals to the screen and in print. Positive representation can change minds and open hearts, which is why accurate storytelling matters so much. I hope we continue to see more voices from within our community telling our own stories.
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| This saree I am wearing is a gift from the person I love and admire. |
Monika: When you were going through your transition, did you have any transgender role models or inspiring figures you looked up to? Who helped you find strength and hope during that time?
Kalki: Yes, absolutely. Calpernia Addams the transgender actor and singer; the French warrior Joan of Arc; and I also admired women like Lady Diana, Mother Teresa, and Sushmita Sen. These remarkable women showed me courage, compassion, and resilience in different ways. Their stories gave me hope that I too could live authentically and with dignity. Having such role models helped me believe in myself even when the world felt challenging.
Monika: Looking back, what was the most difficult part of coming out as transgender to your family and those closest to you? How did you navigate those early moments of truth?
Kalki: I used to be this little feminine boy at school, and my parents knew right from my childhood that I was an effeminate little kid. When I came out to them as a woman, a transgender, they were in complete shock. It took many days for my mother to come to terms with what I said. I had to prove to my mother that I would live a dignified life when I transitioned, no matter what I became or changed into. I worked so hard. Those early days were full of uncertainty and emotional struggle, but I was determined to show them my true self. Slowly, patience and persistence helped soften their fears. It was a journey of healing and acceptance for all of us.
Monika: How has love shaped your life and your journey as a transgender woman? Could you share what role love plays in your personal growth and happiness?
Kalki: Love is magic, love is chemistry. Love can make you great or can make you go insane and destroy you. For me, love has changed my world; love has driven me and designed my path. It has given me strength during the toughest moments and hope when things seemed impossible. Love teaches us acceptance, not just from others, but most importantly, from ourselves. Without love, my journey would have been much lonelier and far less meaningful.
Monika: Fashion is such a powerful form of self-expression. How do you approach your personal style? Are there particular types of outfits, colors, or trends that resonate with you or make you feel most confident?
Kalki: Yes, I love fashion. But I always go for what suits me and wear those outfits that give me confidence and happiness. I love both traditional and modern outfits. I love sarees, chudis, anarkalis, patialas, punjabis, and my favourite colors are red and white. Fashion, for me, is not just about following trends, it’s about embracing my identity and culture. Sometimes, I mix styles to create something uniquely mine. Clothes are like a language I use to tell my story without words.
Kalki: Yes, absolutely. Calpernia Addams the transgender actor and singer; the French warrior Joan of Arc; and I also admired women like Lady Diana, Mother Teresa, and Sushmita Sen. These remarkable women showed me courage, compassion, and resilience in different ways. Their stories gave me hope that I too could live authentically and with dignity. Having such role models helped me believe in myself even when the world felt challenging.
Monika: Looking back, what was the most difficult part of coming out as transgender to your family and those closest to you? How did you navigate those early moments of truth?
Kalki: I used to be this little feminine boy at school, and my parents knew right from my childhood that I was an effeminate little kid. When I came out to them as a woman, a transgender, they were in complete shock. It took many days for my mother to come to terms with what I said. I had to prove to my mother that I would live a dignified life when I transitioned, no matter what I became or changed into. I worked so hard. Those early days were full of uncertainty and emotional struggle, but I was determined to show them my true self. Slowly, patience and persistence helped soften their fears. It was a journey of healing and acceptance for all of us.
Monika: How has love shaped your life and your journey as a transgender woman? Could you share what role love plays in your personal growth and happiness?
Kalki: Love is magic, love is chemistry. Love can make you great or can make you go insane and destroy you. For me, love has changed my world; love has driven me and designed my path. It has given me strength during the toughest moments and hope when things seemed impossible. Love teaches us acceptance, not just from others, but most importantly, from ourselves. Without love, my journey would have been much lonelier and far less meaningful.
Monika: Fashion is such a powerful form of self-expression. How do you approach your personal style? Are there particular types of outfits, colors, or trends that resonate with you or make you feel most confident?
Kalki: Yes, I love fashion. But I always go for what suits me and wear those outfits that give me confidence and happiness. I love both traditional and modern outfits. I love sarees, chudis, anarkalis, patialas, punjabis, and my favourite colors are red and white. Fashion, for me, is not just about following trends, it’s about embracing my identity and culture. Sometimes, I mix styles to create something uniquely mine. Clothes are like a language I use to tell my story without words.
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| On a rock in Central Park, New York. |
Monika: Beauty pageants for transgender women have become more visible in recent years. What is your perspective on these competitions? Do you think they help empower trans women, or do they reinforce certain stereotypes?
Kalki: I am totally against all these beauty pageants held across the country and around the globe. We don’t need a title to proclaim to the world that we are beautiful. I believe every person is beautiful if they have noble qualities to cherish. True beauty goes far beyond physical appearance or trophies. These contests can sometimes reduce a person’s worth to just looks, which feels limiting. I would rather see us celebrated for our strength, intelligence, and character than for a crown.
Monika: Many transgender women have bravely shared their journeys by writing memoirs. Have you ever considered writing your own life story? What would you want readers to take away from it?
Kalki: Yes, I have thought about it, and my story will be an open and honest account of my life. Transwoman Revathi is an inspiration to me in this aspect. My book will carry many sweet experiences which happened in my life. I want my story to give hope to those who feel lost or afraid to live their truth. Writing it would also help me reflect on the struggles and triumphs that shaped me. Ultimately, I hope it encourages society to understand and accept transgender people more deeply.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender women who are struggling with gender dysphoria and the challenges of transition? How can they find strength and navigate this difficult journey?
Kalki: Be courageous, be hopeful, don’t fear, don’t rush. Most transgender women want to transition immediately. It is a whole new life and a new identity. Take counseling and go for surgery only if it is necessary. Don’t self-medicate; always consult with doctors and trusted friends. Most importantly, make sure you have a career and savings for your new life post-surgery.
Kalki: I am totally against all these beauty pageants held across the country and around the globe. We don’t need a title to proclaim to the world that we are beautiful. I believe every person is beautiful if they have noble qualities to cherish. True beauty goes far beyond physical appearance or trophies. These contests can sometimes reduce a person’s worth to just looks, which feels limiting. I would rather see us celebrated for our strength, intelligence, and character than for a crown.
Monika: Many transgender women have bravely shared their journeys by writing memoirs. Have you ever considered writing your own life story? What would you want readers to take away from it?
Kalki: Yes, I have thought about it, and my story will be an open and honest account of my life. Transwoman Revathi is an inspiration to me in this aspect. My book will carry many sweet experiences which happened in my life. I want my story to give hope to those who feel lost or afraid to live their truth. Writing it would also help me reflect on the struggles and triumphs that shaped me. Ultimately, I hope it encourages society to understand and accept transgender people more deeply.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender women who are struggling with gender dysphoria and the challenges of transition? How can they find strength and navigate this difficult journey?
Kalki: Be courageous, be hopeful, don’t fear, don’t rush. Most transgender women want to transition immediately. It is a whole new life and a new identity. Take counseling and go for surgery only if it is necessary. Don’t self-medicate; always consult with doctors and trusted friends. Most importantly, make sure you have a career and savings for your new life post-surgery.
Hold on to people who truly love you and be thankful to them.
Remember, healing is a process, and it’s okay to take your time. Surround yourself with positive support, and never lose sight of your worth and dreams. You are not alone in this journey, many have walked it before and are ready to help.
Monika: Kalki, it has been such an inspiring and heartfelt conversation. Thank you so much for sharing your story and insights with us today. Before we wrap up, is there any message or hope you would like to leave for our readers, especially transgender women everywhere?
Kalki: Thank you, Monika! It was a pleasure talking to you. I hope my journey encourages others to be brave and live authentically. Remember, every step forward is a victory. Keep believing in yourself and never lose hope.
Monika: Kalki, it has been such an inspiring and heartfelt conversation. Thank you so much for sharing your story and insights with us today. Before we wrap up, is there any message or hope you would like to leave for our readers, especially transgender women everywhere?
Kalki: Thank you, Monika! It was a pleasure talking to you. I hope my journey encourages others to be brave and live authentically. Remember, every step forward is a victory. Keep believing in yourself and never lose hope.
All the photos: courtesy of Kalki Subramaniam.
© 2014 - Monika Kowalska
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