She is also the proud author of The Woman I Am: My Journey from Richard to Samantha, a candid and heartfelt memoir that invites readers into her personal story of navigating dual discrimination, overcoming obstacles, and finding strength in authenticity. The book, recently published and available on Amazon, is already offering hope and guidance to those who may feel isolated in their own journeys. What makes Samantha’s voice so powerful is not only her willingness to share her truth but also her deep compassion for others. She knows what it means to fight against silence, misunderstanding, and prejudice, and she has chosen to turn her experiences into a beacon for those who come after her. Whether she is speaking to professionals eager to learn, engaging with her social media followers, or simply reminding someone that they are not alone, Samantha embodies the courage to live authentically and the generosity to use her story in service of others.
Monika: Hello Samantha, thank you so much for accepting my invitation!
Samantha: Hello Monika!
Monika: To start, could you introduce yourself and tell our readers a little about who you are?
Samantha: I was born profoundly deaf and grew up in the Northeast of England. I’m also a post-operative transgender woman and now live in Manchester.
Monika: Your journey has been featured quite extensively in the British media. How did you feel about the way your story was portrayed?
Samantha: Sometimes, it depends on the media. Most of the British media approached me and checked with me to ensure that the articles were correct. However, some outlets created articles without consulting me, and the language used could be inappropriate at times.
|
| Available via Amazon. |
Samantha: I decided to publish the book hoping to be able to support the deaf transgender community and let them know that they’re not alone. The journey, experiences, and dilemmas I have faced caused me to fight such a huge battle throughout my life. The roller coaster I have gone through, being deaf and transgender, resulted in dual discrimination. I’m in no position to be able to help everyone, but if I could change one person's mindset in the community and their perspective toward the transgender community in a positive way, then I would be happy.
Monika: What led you to choose Samantha as your name?
Samantha: I asked my parents what my name would have been if I had been born a girl. They said it would have been Samantha Jayne. So I stuck with that because I believe it’s important to continue the bond I had with my parents.
Monika: You are active on social media. What kinds of questions do your followers usually ask you?
Samantha: The most common question would be whether it hurts having the GRS. Sometimes the questions they ask can be quite sensitive, but I’m OK to respond to them because I’m in a position where I want to educate others. If I don’t answer, how are they supposed to learn?
Monika: I know from personal experience how difficult it is to live openly as a transgender woman. For you, it must have been even harder because you also had to cope with being deaf. What were your teenage years like?
Samantha: My teenage years were a real struggle for me, experiencing a phase where I was totally confused with my life and what I wanted in the future. My depression was so severe that I had an eating disorder and I was chain-smoking. I was in a dark place for a long time until I reached my 20s.
Monika: Many transgender people pay a high price for the freedom to live as themselves, often losing family ties, friendships, jobs, or social standing. Did you face such losses, and what was the most difficult part of coming out for you?
Samantha: The hardest thing about coming out was the thought of losing my family, whom I dearly love. I grew up with such a strong bond with my parents and my brothers, and breaking that bond would have broken my heart instantly. However, I’m quite lucky that the bond remains, and although the deaf community is small, it is very close-knit. Everyone tends to know each other.
Monika: Even with family support, what other challenges have been the most painful for you personally?
Samantha: The hardest thing for me is having to develop a thick skin when I see others using British Sign Language to talk about my previous gender from a distance where I can easily read their signs.
|
| "The hardest thing about coming out was the thought of losing my family who I dearly love very much." |
Monika: How did your parents and the rest of your family react when you told them about your transition? Was it something they were able to accept easily?
Samantha: My family did struggle at first. They struggled with my transition as they felt they didn’t really have support for parents in the United Kingdom. There’s no service that supports parents dealing with their children's transition. They had to cope with grief, seeing my transition as if they had lost their son. But by having a new daughter, their coping strategy was to see me as a twin.
Monika: What helped your parents come to terms with your decision to begin your transition, and how did you guide them through those early steps?
Samantha: When I came out to my parents, they were very proactive in getting me seen by a specialist. They knew how unwell I was, with weight loss, thinning hair, and poor mental health. As soon as I set foot in the gender identity clinic, I never looked back. My life turned from darkness into the blossomed person I am today.
Monika: Looking back now, how satisfied are you with the results of hormone therapy?
Samantha: I’m about 90% satisfied. The only thing that has bothered me most is that facial hair is very difficult to get rid of completely, especially with IPL and electrolysis, which still remains a challenge and is very costly.
|
| "When I came out to my parents, they were very proactive in getting me seen by the specialist." Photo by @tonyjongphotography. |
Monika: Many transgender women feel trapped by the idea of passing or not passing, as if our worth is constantly measured by how others perceive us. Cosmetic surgeries can help, but the judgment never completely disappears. In your view, what is the best way to deal with this pressure?
Samantha: The most beautiful thing in this world is to teach yourself to love who you are before anything else. Yes, the term “passing” is known within the transgender community, but always remember that everyone is beautiful in their own way. Always say to yourself, there is only one life and you have to live this life in order to fulfill your dream. Transgender individuals are doing this for themselves, for their own mental well-being, in order to be as happy as possible in life. You just be who you are.
Monika: Thinking back to your younger years, do you remember the first time you ever saw a transgender woman on television or met someone transgender in person?
Samantha: I grew up struggling with my identity, and I never knew what transgender meant due to my deafness. I was living in a silent world. I watched TV one day, Big Brother, and Nadia Almada was on the show. I never knew what transgender meant until someone explained it to me in British Sign Language. One day, I bumped into a transgender person at Manchester Pride, and I knew instantly that it was the right decision for me to transition, as I had struggled with my identity for a very long time.
Monika: Who have been the transgender role models that inspired or guided you on your journey?
Samantha: Laverne Cox is a good one for me because she has shown the world that there are no barriers. Keep on achieving, and it shows that if you have the dream, you can achieve it.
|
| "We are still facing transphobic issues but people across the UK are becoming more forward-thinking about diversity." Photo by @tonyjongphotography. |
Monika: How would you describe the current situation for transgender women in the United Kingdom?
Samantha: We are still facing transphobic issues, but people across the UK are becoming more forward-thinking about diversity. While the public is heading in the right direction, it feels like the UK and US governments are going backwards from time to time.
Monika: Fashion is such a powerful way of expressing identity. What styles do you enjoy wearing, and do you have any favorite brands, colors, or trends?
Samantha: I love fashion. My favorite clothes to date are probably from ASOS or ZARA. I like smart and trendy clothes. There’s no particular color or trend I like, apart from the fact it’s got to look cute!
Monika: Do you enjoy trying out different looks with makeup, and do you experiment often?
Samantha: I always experiment with lots of different types of makeup. There are times when I apply better makeup products, which are sometimes cheaper and long-lasting.
Monika: Compliments can be tricky for many of us. How do you feel when people compliment you on your appearance?
Samantha: I am really bad at taking compliments. I don’t take compliments very well, and that’s my weakness!! :)
Monika: Can you recall your first job interview after beginning to live openly as a woman?
Samantha: Yes, very clearly. It was somewhat a positive experience for me, as I was offered the job on the same day.
Monika: What advice would you give to other transgender women who are searching for employment?
Samantha: Never give up, and the best tip is to ask someone you know to see if you can put your foot in the door in order to get into employment.
|
| "I would like to be able to set up a charity organization that represents deaf transgender people worldwide." |
Monika: How do you participate in the life of the local LGBTQ community?
Samantha: Yes, I’m currently teaching transgender workshops for professionals and anyone who’s keen to learn more about what’s under the term of the transgender umbrella.
Monika: Can you share how love shapes your life and what role it plays for you personally?
Samantha: My partner and my family are some of the most important things in my life right now.
Monika: Looking ahead, what are your goals for the near future, and where do you hope to see yourself in the next five to seven years?
Samantha: I would like to be able to set up a charity organization that represents deaf transgender people worldwide.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender women who feel afraid to start their transition?
Samantha: Never be afraid of the transition; the pain is bearable. You’ll never look back once you’ve transitioned, because you’ll become your true self.
Monika: A pen friend of mine once wrote that we should not limit our potential because of the circumstances of our birth or what we see other transgender people doing. Our dreams should not end on an operating table; that’s where they begin. Do you agree with this perspective?
Samantha: Absolutely, there is no limit to our potential in life.
Monika: Samantha, it has been such a pleasure speaking with you. Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Samantha: You are welcome, and thank you for giving me the opportunity as well.
All the photos: courtesy of Samantha Pearsall.
© 2021 - Monika Kowalska
Other related sources:
No comments:
Post a Comment