Monika: How would you describe your personal style? Do you follow any specific fashion trends, or do you have go-to outfits that make you feel confident?
Petra: Not at all. I follow my own instincts. I choose whatever catches my eye and whatever I can combine in the way I see it in my head. Of course, I take inspiration from fashion icons and famous people, but ultimately, it is my own choice. I don't care if a piece of clothing is considered outdated. If I like it, I will find a way to bring it back to life. I also love being different with my style. It reflects my personality and the way I see the world.
Monika: Do you love playing around with makeup, or is it more of a “throw on the basics and go” kind of vibe for you?
Petra: Actually, the first time I used makeup was for a photoshoot in Istanbul in 2025. I was so afraid I wouldn't do it properly that my mum and I even practised at home. But then I realised it was something I could do quite easily. Not like a professional, of course, but still... I use makeup from time to time, but 99% of the time I'm completely natural.
Monika: By the way, do you like being complimented on your looks? Do you find it easy to accept compliments, or do you struggle with believing them?
Petra: Actually, that is a very difficult question. I have kept my distance from people for years, and I like it that way. I also find it extremely difficult, almost impossible, to let someone get close to me. But like anyone else, regardless of gender, I enjoy hearing what people think of me. I just don't take their opinions too seriously.
Monika: Did you ever feel pressure to meet a certain ideal of femininity, like I did by trying to look like the women around me?
Petra: I have never tried to be like other people. In fact, I am very afraid of becoming like them. I prefer to follow my own style, my own way, and my own rules, while still staying within what I consider moral and normal, of course.
Monika: Your legal struggle began in 2018. At first, the court in Gorna Oryahovitsa ruled in your favour, only for that victory to be challenged. Do you remember how you felt when you realised that something as personal as your own identity was going to become a long courtroom battle?
Petra: I remember going to the lawyer's office I already knew, with my heart pounding. I felt a lot of excitement and a little fear. I also refused to stay silent when the prosecutor tried to insult me in the courtroom. I knew I would fight until the very end. But I never expected to be attacked by my own country.
Monika: During the legal proceedings, you were subjected to examinations and questions that you found deeply humiliating. How did it feel to have strangers in positions of authority effectively examine and judge whether you were “woman enough”?
Petra: It was humiliating. But I told myself that I had to stand there like a fighter. I knew this moment would come, and I knew I would have to be a role model for those who would face the same thing after me. I hope that in the future it will become easier, and more humane.
Monika: At one point, you had to make a choice: give up or take Bulgaria to the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg. Was there ever a moment when you genuinely thought, “I cannot do this anymore”, and if so, what made you continue?
Petra: No, never. Actually, all these “fights” have made me the strong-willed woman I am today. Not without some damage, of course. But I was willing to go all the way, reach the end, and win. Now we are suing Bulgaria for the second time, which is happening for the first time in history.
 |
| "All these “fights” have made me the strong-willed woman I am today." |
Monika: On 27 September 2022, you won your case against Bulgaria at the European Court of Human Rights. How did you learn about the decision, and what was the very first thing that went through your mind when you realised that you had won?
Petra: When my lawyers, Mikhail Ekimdzhiev and Milena Dokova, two very well-known and highly respected lawyers, called me, I was doing my practice in the midwifery ward at the hospital. There were newborn babies all around me. I felt like one of them, newly born myself, and somehow that felt like no coincidence.
Monika: Winning against your own country in Strasbourg is an extraordinary achievement. However, there was a painful irony in your story: you won an important international human-rights case, yet your struggle for documents reflecting your identity continued. What does that do to a person's faith in justice?
Petra: I lost my hope in my own country the moment they made me wait nine years, as of 2026, unfortunately. But I will continue to protect and advocate for those who cannot do this for themselves. And I believe I will win. I believe new rules will eventually be introduced that will make the process easier for those people.
Monika: Activism can be empowering, but it can also be exhausting. After years of explaining yourself, defending yourself, and fighting institutions, have there been times when you simply wanted to stop being “Petra the transgender activist” and just be Petra, a successful and talented young woman?
Petra: Yes, exactly. I actually have those thoughts nowadays. But something inside me won't let me simply quit fighting because people need me, you, and all of us. Together, we can make a difference, however clichéd that may sound. At the same time, I am trying to find a balance between being a strong woman who fights for others and simply being myself.
Monika: Many trans women are writing their memoirs these days. Have you ever thought about writing your own book, and if so, what would its central message be?
Petra: This is a very sad question, and I thank you for asking it. I have thought about it. In fact, I have already had two books published. The first came out in 2022 and told my story, as well as including an appendix with a translation of the WPATH guidelines. I have a Bachelor's degree in translation. The second book was more about my inner and spiritual world. Unfortunately, both books disappeared. I couldn't get in touch with the publisher, and nobody did anything about it. Years of my writing simply went up in smoke.
Monika: Love, companionship, and belonging are themes that can easily disappear when the media turns someone into a legal case or an activist, and for a lot of trans girls, loneliness can become a part of life. Did you ever feel that, or were you lucky enough to avoid it?
Petra: I have been lonely for most of my life. If it weren't for my mother and grandmother, I might be the loneliest girl in the world. But I still have feelings for one man, whom I believe is my twin flame. I also love animals, and I try to advocate for them. I had a beautiful white cat for 18 years. She was my companion through the lonely years of my childhood.
Monika: Finally, what's next for Petra? What dreams and goals are you working toward now?
Petra: I continue to see Turkey as an important part of my future. I have written a book and a screenplay in Turkish about a twin-flame connection, and I really hope that one day I can bring the story to life with my beloved man. I know it is a big project, but I believe I can handle it with the right motivation. I will continue to advocate for those who cannot advocate for themselves. I want to be a freedom fighter as well as an artistic person. I think I will show the world more of my artistic side in the future. I am always open to new journeys, new emotions... and new horizons.
END OF PART 2
All photos: courtesy of Petra Hristova.
© 2026 - Monika Kowalska
No comments:
Post a Comment