In the bustling streets of Hong Kong, where neon lights reflect the city’s relentless pace, Beatrice Wong Suet-ling quietly carved out a life that is anything but ordinary. At 36, she balances the precision of IT support work with the imaginative world of filmmaking, all while living openly as a transgender woman in a society that still grapples with acceptance. Beatrice doesn’t see herself as a spokesperson or activist, she’s simply a woman who refuses to hide, sharing her story with honesty, humor, and a touch of daring. From beginning her transition at 31 to creating a documentary about her journey, Beatrice has navigated both the inner labyrinth of self-discovery and the practical realities of healthcare, family support, and social visibility.
Along the way, she has confronted the subtle and not-so-subtle challenges of living authentically, from passing as a woman to finding love, forging friendships, and pursuing creative dreams. Her reflections on mentorship, representation, and resilience reveal a perspective that is at once personal and profoundly instructive for anyone seeking to understand the lived experiences of transgender women in Hong Kong. In this interview, Beatrice invites us into her world, a space where dreams are pursued boldly, identity is reclaimed with care, and life is lived fully, on her own terms. From fashion to love, from societal norms to cinematic storytelling, her journey is a testament to the power of self-acceptance, courage, and creative vision. Now, let’s step into her story and hear directly from Beatrice Wong Suet-ling herself.
Monika: Hi Beatrice! It’s such a pleasure to have you with us today.
Beatrice: Hello Monika, I’m so honored to be interviewed by such an international platform, never thought I could have global appeal!
Monika: Beatrice, could you introduce yourself to our readers and tell us a bit about your journey so far?
Beatrice: I’m a simple trans woman from Hong Kong. I’ve appeared in the news a few times (which is how you discovered me), but I do not consider myself a representative or an activist. I don’t believe I am well-versed in academic or inspirational speak; I’m just simply available to talk about my experiences. A lot of transgender people hide from the limelight because, no matter how much society has progressed, there is always some form of social stigmatization somewhere.
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| Beatrice just before high school. |
Monika: What makes you willing to step into that limelight despite these challenges?
Beatrice: I’m not afraid to stand out because I believe the world is a big place, and if one corner doesn’t accept me, there’s always another corner where I can exist. I also made a documentary about my transition, which has been shown at a few festivals. I’ll share the documentary with your blog once the screenings are finished. I’ve submitted it to a few other festivals, and results are pending, so it will be a few months before I can publicly share the video.
Monika: At what age did you begin your transition, and how challenging was the process for you?
Beatrice: I started transitioning around 31, and had surgery at 35. I was very fortunate not to have a difficult transition because I didn’t lose all my friends, my family stood beside me after I came out, and cared for me during my surgery and recovery. I am still able to hold on to my job. The struggles when I am trying to figure out why I hate my (male) self so much are more profound.
Monika: How would you describe the healthcare services available to transgender women in Hong Kong? In many parts of the world, people travel to Europe, the USA, or Thailand for feminization surgeries. How does it work in your city?
Beatrice: The government healthcare system is kind enough to provide care for us, so we don’t have to panic while looking for affordable private practices. To be referred for surgery under the government system, you need to go through psychiatric and clinical psychology evaluations, and the dreaded “real-life experience test.” I actually found these evaluations very helpful in affirming my gender convictions; I wasn’t repulsed at all, and they helped me a lot through the transition.
Monika: And what about the quality of the surgeries themselves?
Beatrice: Quality-wise, I had a pretty successful surgery, things look good down there, attractive enough for my girlfriend. However, since the surgeons aren’t dedicated solely to performing SRS, and because more experienced surgeons sometimes retire or are reassigned, some surgeons may be relatively inexperienced. That’s why some transgender people in Hong Kong prefer to go to Thailand, where surgical skills may be more specialized, or if they don’t agree with the evaluation process.
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| Beatrice going to work after graduating from University. |
Monika: During your transition, were there any transgender role models in Hong Kong or China whom you looked up to? Were there individuals whose work or life you particularly admired?
Beatrice: I don’t have a particular role model, but Joanne Leung, who founded the Transgender Resource Centre in Hong Kong, gave me a lot of advice, encouragement, and support throughout the whole process. She is very strong because she was one of the first transgender people to become publicly visible in Hong Kong and helped turn the tide toward greater acceptance. She also works tirelessly to expand transgender presence in many fields and even dabbled in politics.
Monika: It sounds like mentorship played a big role in your journey. How do you view the difference between a mentor and a role model in the context of transgender experiences?
Beatrice: I guess I needed a mentor more than a role model because transgender experiences are unique to each person. What works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another, so a lot of self-discovery is involved. Mentorship is more valuable than a distant role model.
Monika: How would you describe the general situation for trans women where you live? Are there specific challenges or protections that stand out?
Beatrice: Well, the concept of “country” is a bit complicated for me, living in Hong Kong. Is my country China? Or Hong Kong? China is a mysterious place that I know very little about, so I can only comment on the situation of trans women in Hong Kong. Speaking from my own experience, I am fortunate that I wasn’t a victim of violence. I also haven’t heard of many violent incidents among my circle of sisters. It’s generally safe to walk on the street presenting in one’s preferred gender identity.
Monika: What about practical challenges like employment or legal recognition?
Beatrice: Employment is still an issue for us, as there is a lingering perception that having transgender staff will hurt business, so it remains difficult in this area. Regarding ID documents, there is a rule that requires some semblance of sex organs corresponding to one’s gender, which means surgery is often necessary. However, such rules can be particularly hard on trans men, because the surgeries they would need are more complicated and carry higher risks of complications.
Monika: Reflecting on your journey, what was the most difficult part of coming out as a transgender woman?
Beatrice: I guess the hardest thing is coming to terms with the fact that it’s going to be harder to meet new “vanilla” friends. When I decided to come out, I was ready to survive life alone, though that can also be a relaxing way to live. So the fact that many friends stayed beside me was a bonus.
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| Fooling around a photo studio a few months after SR. |
Monika: How did your family and work environment respond during this period?
Beatrice: The situation was similar with my family, if they didn’t want to recognize me as Beatrice, I’d just move on. It’s sort of like a scorched-earth policy: a big gamble, but why not? Losing control over your own gender identity is worse than losing people who don’t support you. At work, I didn’t come out immediately; I waited until after I was able to change my identity card before announcing that I am Miss Wong. For quite some time, I was a dress-wearing Mister Wong at work. Those times were a bit hard, but it was the only way for me to pay my bills.
Monika: Many transgender women face pressure to “pass” as a woman in society. How do you view this challenge for yourself and for other trans women?
Beatrice: Well, to me, “passing” as a woman is like playing a video game with infinite levels. There is no final showdown with a big boss, since perfection is unattainable, but there is joy in advancing through the levels.
Monika: That’s an interesting analogy. Can you explain how the early stages of this “game” work for trans women?
Beatrice: In the first few levels, you start with some primitive tools and often fail to advance to the next level. But through the process, you learn new skills, accumulate more powerful tools, understand what to avoid, and eventually the process gets easier, allowing you to progress naturally. You just try your best and make an effort whenever you can. All swans start as ugly ducklings, but as long as they believe in themselves and grow, they can become swans too. If someone gets stuck thinking they are an ugly duckling, hides in a muddy cave, and stops trying, they lose their chances to flourish.
Monika: So there isn’t a single standard for what a woman should look or act like?
Beatrice: Exactly. There is no rigid standard for defining how a woman should look or behave. Even biological women don’t all follow a set of rules controlling appearance or behavior.
Monika: How has this perspective shaped your own experience of transitioning?
Beatrice: Transitioning in such a liberal time is a blessing, not just for me but for other sisters as well. I was once blinded by the pursuit of perfection, trying to perfect my walk, voice, body, wardrobe, and gestures. But I realized that women on the street don’t obsess over perfection; they live life casually and define a style that feels comfortable for them. I follow their example, there’s no need to turn my life into a 24/7 beauty contest.
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| At a storytelling event talking about SRS. |
Monika: The transgender cause is often included within the broader LGBTQ community. As the last letter in the acronym, do you feel the transgender community is able to effectively promote its own issues and gain visibility within this larger group?
Beatrice: Of course, a lot of NGOs that were originally dedicated to gay and lesbian causes have now expanded to include transgender causes. So there are more resources and events for transgender people at all stages to come together and exchange knowledge, ideas, questions, struggles, and support. I guess being the last letter in an acronym doesn’t define our position in the community, we are all equally visible.
Monika: How do you feel transgender characters and stories have been portrayed in films, newspapers, and books so far?
Beatrice: It’s becoming more and more positive now. I remember when I was a teenager, transgender characters were 99.9999% used for comic relief in local Hong Kong TV series (the situation is still more or less the same today in fictional films and TV shows), and there wasn’t much coverage in the news media.
Monika: Have you noticed any improvements in how the media represents transgender people?
Beatrice: Yes. Appearances in local newspapers and news features have become more humane, in-depth, and heartening. Things are definitely more progressive in English media, and European media too, though my exposure to European media is very limited, so I cannot say for sure. Entire movies and TV series are now centered around transgender characters, so the local Hong Kong media still has some catching up to do.
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| Posing for Laura Simonsen's gender identity photo project. |
Monika: Have you personally been involved in any lobbying or advocacy campaigns? More broadly, do you think transgender women can have an impact in politics?
Beatrice: I personally have not participated in any lobbying campaigns. However, I know that Joanne tried to run as a councilwoman in a recent election. Her political party was strongly against the idea because they didn’t want to be labeled as a “Tranny Party,” which is incredibly narrow-minded. She ultimately was not selected to run.
END OF PART 1
All photos: courtesy of Beatrice Wong Suet-ling.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
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