Monika: How well are transgender people represented in LGBTQ organizations and leadership?
Ella: It’s a significant issue that many LGBTQ support groups and centers have few or no transgender people on their boards of directors. Many of these organizations are dominated by gay men advocating primarily for gay men’s interests. Often, the number of lesbian women involved is also quite small. Another challenge is that transgender people who have completed their transition sometimes stop being activists for the community.
Monika: What is your view on how the transgender community should engage within the LGBTQ movement?
Ella: I believe LGBTQ stands for diversity, and we must be a little louder to claim our rights both inside and outside the LGBTQ movement. At the same time, we will always need special transgender-focused groups because our needs are different and deserve dedicated attention.
Monika: What do you think in general about transgender news stories or characters which have been featured in films, newspapers, or books so far?Ella: It is important that stories of transgender people have some kind of impact, that people learn about us in a normal and positive manner. We have to change the minds of most cis people, to accept us, and see us as normal. With the new generation of people this is happening, but not with the older generations and with some religious movements. News and stories are important. They have to become visible in order to increase acceptance.
Monika: Do you participate in any lobbying campaigns? Can transgender women make a difference in politics?
Ella: Sure, I am a NEAT volunteer (NEAT = National Equality Action Team), I contribute to HRC (Human Rights Campaign) and National Center for Transgender Equality. I am following, supporting, and even volunteering with local LGBT communities such as the Compass Group in Lake Worth.
I have my own transgender group called South Florida TG Social, which is a group mainly aimed at social events within the community in South Florida. My involvement is developing because this is a very important and good cause, we deserve to fight for our rights.
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| Ready for the 1st Alumni as Ella. |
Monika: Do you believe we’ll witness a transgender woman rising to one of the highest offices in the United States, perhaps even President or First Lady, within our lifetime?
Ella: Well, we are still far from a woman president in this country. I think that there is still a lot to do to get there. A transgender woman as President or First Lady is, in my opinion, still very far away. But I believe that soon we will see transgender people in many government positions, or even in the Senate.
Monika: I’ve seen some of your photos and really admired your sense of style! Are you passionate about fashion? What kind of clothes do you like to wear? Any favorite designers, colors, or trends?
Ella: Yes, I love fashion and I even made and sold my own fashion many years ago in Switzerland. My favorite colors are reds, coral, blue, black, white, and of course beige. We live in a world where all is accepted, but I try to create my own style: contrasting and vivid colors, for example, blacks with reds, some floral and graphic prints, but in moderation. As far as designers are concerned, I love people like Ralph Lauren or Calvin Klein and buy a lot from great local stores. I love to go bargain shopping, and sometimes I find tremendous designer pieces for very low prices. Another great love is, of course, shoes, I have quite a collection. Aldo is my favorite store. I share this love with my daughter.
Monika: What are your thoughts on transgender beauty pageants?
Ella: Transgender women are women and think like women. Of course, beauty is part of our life. Some of the beauty pageant contestants are great people and lovely girls, and I mean that whether they are transsexual or crossdressers.
Monika: How important is love in your life?
Ella: Love is central in everything. In my case, love and respect for my family and my partner are very important. I have a great relationship with my wife, Karin. We have been together for 25 years now, and we are conquering the diversity barrier in our marriage, not so easy.
Monika: Are there any new projects you’re currently working on?
Ella: Yes, I will be publishing an essay on male supremacy and being a transgender woman. Well, lose the so-called male card. At the same time, I’m looking at male rights from the angle of a cis woman and coming to the conclusion that it is time to apply equality no matter what you are. I am also working on my next book, a play about various transgender rights issues.
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| On Ella’s 60th birthday. |
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are currently battling gender dysphoria?
Ella: Be strong, understand your feelings, look for help, there are some support groups available. Get a counselor. Once you know who you really are, develop self-confidence and live your true self. Don’t go too fast; understand the challenges you have to go through. Contact people who are like you in your area. You will rock, girl or boy.
Monika: A dear pen friend of mine, Gina Grahame, once said that we shouldn’t limit our potential based on how we were born or what we see other trans people doing. “Our dreams shouldn’t end on an operating table,” she told me. “That’s where they begin.” Does that resonate with you?
Ella: I believe that we have extraordinary people who are transgender, our potential is bigger than most people think. Gina is right: follow your dreams, and “it’s time to be yourself.” Looking back at the history of transgender people, yes, we’ve existed since the beginning, and transgender individuals have been reported for over 3,000 years.
In many civilizations, like the American Indians, Mexican Indians, Africans, and many others, transgender people used to be seen as very special because they could understand both men and women. The transgender revolution we are experiencing now is nothing more than reclaiming our rights, the ones we lost with modern civilization.
Monika: Ella, thank you so much for sharing your story and insights with me.
Ella: Monika, please keep on with the good work for our community!
All the photos: courtesy of Ella Marques.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
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