Monika: Have you read or watched anything recently about transgender life that stayed with you, whether a book, an event, or a film?
Kathryn: Without a doubt, it would have to be "Lady Valor: The Kristin Beck Story". Kristin lives her life truthfully as a transgender woman. She came out publicly on CNN, taking many friends and family by surprise, and she encountered more bigotry than she ever expected. After a lifetime of service, Kristin has learned that her fight for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness did not end on the battlefield.
Monika: The transgender cause is usually presented together with those of the other LGBT communities, and T is the last letter in the abbreviation. Is the transgender community able to promote its own cause within the group?
Kathryn: I have been asked by gays and lesbians how the T fits into LGBT, and why transgender rights should be part of the larger gay agenda. After all, their fight is about sex and ours is about gender. But the reason we are all in this together is that being transgender is a core part of our identity, just as being gay, lesbian, or bisexual is a core part of theirs.
Monika: So what do transgender people share with the rest of the community when it comes to the challenges they face?
Kathryn: We face many of the same challenges posed by society. Since we were born with an incompatible gender identity, our sociological struggles related to sexual preference and non-conformity fit right in with the rest of the LGBT community. Crossdressers have other equally important conflicts, which lead them to depression, failed marriages, and even suicide.
Monika: Crossdressers seem to carry a burden of their own. How does it show up in their everyday lives?
Kathryn: For crossdressers, expressing their gender identity causes such a primitive reaction among members of society that they are sometimes attacked, based solely on their appearance, rejected by their family and friends, or even fired from their places of employment, simply because they want to dress like women. The crossdressers' struggles in society are based not only on their gender orientation but also on their gender presentation. The transgender community is vast and diverse, and we all know what it’s like to be excluded. We can accomplish much more when we practice the very acceptance and equality we’re fighting for, with the people closest to us. In other words, trans men, trans women, and crossdressers, we’re all in this together.
Monika: Harvey Milk became the face of gay activism in the 60s and 70s. Is there anyone in the US transgender community whose actions could be compared to his?
Kathryn: Sadly, not that I am aware of. Although Kristin Beck shows signs of heading that way.
Monika: Politics plays a big part in any rights movement. Are you active in it yourself, perhaps through lobbying campaigns, and can transgender women really make a difference there?
Kathryn: I am only active in politics to the extent of voting and volunteering in all projects that will result in transgender rights. But I am happy to see several trans women poised to seek election to our congress, and many others who are going to get our rights or die trying.
Monika: Turning to style, do you enjoy fashion? Tell me what you usually wear, and whether any designs, colors, or trends stand out for you.
Kathryn: Since I am 68, I tend to go for slightly more conservative clothing. I love skirts and leggings and pretty blouses. I am not fond of five-inch heels but favor three-inch heels, wedges, and ballet flats. I love violet, purple, pink, blue, and denim.
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| Promotion for Kathryn Camfield's 2015 paperback book. |
Monika: What role does love play in your life?
Kathryn: I value Cindy so much. Being alive at 68 is something I never thought I would be. Living as a woman is my dream come true, and I owe it to my wife Cindy, the most extraordinary and supportive woman I have ever known. After all the years I had to hide my true nature, just being permitted to be who I really am is a pleasure. After four decades of shame and deception, I can finally acknowledge my identity publicly. I am proud to be my own version of a woman. Cindy is the only person I love in the whole world, and I adore her and tell her so nearly every day. We love being together, we love so many of the same things, and we complement each other so well. She’s stronger than I am, I am more logical than she is, she has no sense of direction, and I am never lost. But most of all, we are kind, considerate, and completely in love with one another.
Monika: Many transgender women choose to tell their story in a memoir. Has the thought ever crossed your mind?
Kathryn: Actually, I kind of am, because this new book is about 35% memoir. In order to tell people about crossdressers and their very real problems, I had to tell about my experiences. In order to encourage all of us to support the rest of us under that transgender umbrella, I had to tell what I have learned about the fight for our rights.
Monika: Do you have any new projects underway?
Kathryn: Well, my book Your Gender: Your Choice! is taking up most of my time at the moment and will through the balance of 2014. It will be released in 2015 as a paperback book, a Kindle book, and an audiobook. I do plan another book, How to be a Trans Ally, and a third called Crossdressers in a Transgender World. My agent is also pushing me to update and republish my Novel Secrets book about writing novels, and I have an idea for a new writing book called A Movie in Your Mind.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria?
Kathryn: Get help and make friends. You are not alone. I’ve only been on Facebook for about six months, and I have 1,000 trans friends without making an effort. Talk to any trans person you ever meet and ask them about their transition. Read anything you can find about the transgender world. Keep up on the news about all LGBT matters. But above all, be aware that YOU must be the only important person in your world. If others don’t support you, kiss them goodbye and get on with your life. Bottom line: we are all alone. Don’t live your life for others at the expense of your happiness.
Monika: Kathryn, thank you so much for this interview!
Kathryn: Thanks for caring.
END OF PART 2
All the photos: courtesy of Kathryn Camfield.
© 2014 - Monika Kowalska
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