Interview with Mya Byrne - Part 2

Monika: What was the most challenging part of coming out for you?

Mya: Getting over the fear, and dealing with the fallout from certain family and friends.

Monika: The transgender community is often grouped within the broader LGBTQ spectrum, sometimes feeling like the “last letter” in the abbreviation. Do you think trans people are able to effectively promote their own cause within the larger LGBTQ movement?

Mya: I think the queer community, or more specifically, the homonormative, monogamous cis gay and lesbian segment of it, has a lot of work to do in truly understanding and embracing trans people, rather than just offering lip service. The “respectable” gay voices have run the show for a long time, and I’m sick of it. From Sylvia Rivera being pushed out of the movement in the ‘70s, trans women have often been denied their rightful place in the larger struggle. 

Monika: Have you seen any progress in how the LGBTQ community includes and advocates for trans people?

Mya: It is changing. My biggest advocates when I was beginning to come out were cis gay people. But that said, I identify as a dyke, and historically, trans people who are also gay have been dismissed and erased by institutions and individuals, even though we are always on the front lines of major change. I do not wish to assimilate into heteropatriarchal norms of beauty or relationships; my goal is to be as out as I possibly can, queer as hell, and unwilling to accept that heterosexist values define the future of trans acceptance.

Monika: What kind of changes or challenges do you feel still need to happen within mainstream gay activism and the broader movement?

Mya: I don’t want to be “tolerated.” I want equal rights, no matter my presentation or how many people I’m in love with. I think a lot of folks share that, plus those of us who do sex work are not as respected or protected, and are often simply dismissed. Mainstream gay activism needs to examine its exclusionary past and unpack that seriously. I don’t want to play nice. And I don’t want to abolish gender, I want a gender revolution. Our common oppression is toxic misogyny and white supremacy. That should be bringing us together, not tearing us apart.

Monika: How do you feel about the way transgender stories and characters have been portrayed in films, newspapers, and books so far?

Mya: Well, they’re getting better. As more of us speak out and work openly in media, these stories will increase in both quantity and quality. But it’s very difficult to be trans and see the same old tropes repeated, and the same battles fought, when what we really need are basic human rights and protections. Too many of us live on edge, afraid of what monsters we’ll be accused of next, and the media bears a lot of responsibility for the negativity surrounding us. I’m just hoping that cisgender men portraying trans women in Hollywood will end once and for all.

 

I Don't Need You Anymore by Mya Byrne
and Neale Eckstein (YouTube)

 

Monika: Are you involved in any political or lobbying efforts? How much impact do you think transgender women can have in politics?

Mya: I don’t participate in lobbying, but I get out on the streets and am often engaged as a public speaker. On March 8, I spoke at the San Francisco Gender Strike in solidarity with International Women’s Day. And yes, I do believe we are making a huge difference. We are speaking, and speaking loudly. Feminism that doesn’t include trans people is simply not feminism! I’ve noticed attitudes shifting among many older cis feminists after a lot of work, thank stars. I’m proud of people like Gloria Steinem who have sincerely apologized for past dismissals of trans women and sought reconciliation. We are all in this together, and it must be a unified movement.
Monika: How would you describe your personal style? Do you have favorite outfits, colors, or fashion trends that you gravitate toward?

Mya: I love fashion! I’m not exactly a reader of Vogue, but I do my own thing, inspired by what I find on the rack or what my friends make for me. I basically dress like a goth Audrey Hepburn meets a classic flannel-and-cowboy boots dyke. I favor black leather for most of my garments when possible, and when I can afford it, I buy beautiful handmade leather items from Mr. S in San Francisco.

I like hot pink bras and slinky cowl-neck shirts. I wear a lot of Banana Republic, H&M, Michael Kors, stockings and stuff from Target, knee socks, and vintage Levi’s, and I go thrifting a lot. I follow the tall girl ethic of “If it fits, buy two of them!” My usual stage outfit is an A-line high-waisted flared skirt, ripped stockings, calf-high boots, and a leather vest over a low-cut camisole.

Monika: What are your thoughts on transgender beauty pageants?

Mya: I honestly don’t think about them a lot. I would never disparage anyone who takes part in one, they can be very empowering, but they’re not really my thing. I’m more into body-positive all-gender fashion shows.

Monika: Could you share what role love plays in your life?

Mya: I am poly and queer, and surrounded by amazing people. Their love, and I am in love with multiple people, sustains me and helps validate a whole hell of a lot of my choices in life.

Monika: Many trans women write memoirs. Do you have plans to write one yourself?

Mya: Give me a few more years and a book deal...

Monika: Are you currently working on any new creative projects?

Mya: I’m working on a visual media project that includes my music; my music was just featured in a prominent play, and I have some other secret stuff in the works. More to the point of the last question, I’m working on a series of short stories loosely based on my life in San Francisco.

Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls struggling with gender dysphoria?

Mya: Find a mentor, find a friend, believe in yourself, get on testosterone blockers as soon as possible... If you’re in an abusive, unsupportive house, get the hell out and go to New York or San Francisco, or Berlin, or London... Find your local queer safe house. Find the queer punks. They will take care of you. Believe in yourself, you are real, and there is a family out there for you. Don’t let anyone define who you are except you! And write to your heroes. They will often write back, and it can be life-changing.

Mya playing bass with the Homobiles
at Rickshaw Stop, San Francisco. 

Monika: A pen friend of mine, Gina Grahame, once wrote that we shouldn’t limit our potential based on how we were born or by what other transsexual and transgender people do. She said our dreams shouldn’t end on an operating table; that’s where they begin. What do you think about that idea?

Mya: Well, I don’t think the surgical narrative works for many trans people. Nor do I think it’s where dreams end or begin for me personally. I believe surgery is just one of many paths someone can take on this journey, if they choose to do so.

Monika: How important has surgery been in your own journey?

Mya: That said, surgery can help so many, and free access should be available to all. Gender-affirming surgical procedures are a medical necessity for some, and when they get them, there is often a grand sense of relief and elation, a feeling of alignment. That certainly is my physical and metaphysical goal for my body changes. I like the modifications I’ve made to my body, and they have certainly been affirming and good for my soul. I am certain that as I continue into what is the fifth year of my transition and my fourth year of truly being out, I will continue dreaming, and doing. More to the point, yes, I think when one transitions, whatever that means to them personally, so many dreams open up, things you never thought possible erupt like magic. It is a hard road, but one worth all of it.

Monika: Mya, thank you for the interview!

Mya: You are very welcome!

END OF PART 2

Back to PART 1

 

The main photo: Mya at the Falcon Ridge Folk Festival, photo by Laura Foord.

All photos: courtesy of Mya Byrne.

© 2017 - Monika Kowalska