Wednesday 15 February 2023

Interview with Emily Green


Monika: The city of Glasgow is our next destination today where my guest lives. Emily Green is a Scottish transgender woman and blogger that documents her transition on social media. Hello Emily!
Emily: Hiya Monika thank you for having me!
Monika: Could you say a few words about yourself?
Emily: I'm 37 and I am a civil servant by job. I'm a massive wrestling fan and enjoy being a foodie and a small-batch coffee geek. I dabble with the odd ice hockey game and enjoy six nations rugby. I also blog about craft beers as Glasgow Beer Girl.
Monika: When I visit the UK, I usually drink Caffrey's, my favourite one, which is not a craft beer but still palatable to me. What is your favourite one?
Emily: I have a soft spot for the German lager Augustiner Helles. I love IPAs, stouts, and porters.
Monika: What inspired you to share your intimate life moments on social media?
Emily: For me, I found this journey to get to where I am so difficult and challenging. I want to be able to share my journey in the hope that it is not such a difficult path for future transgender persons who decide when they are ready to come out.
Monika: Why did you choose Emily for your name?
Emily: I remember a girl in school called Emily. She was beautiful. Her surname was Greenhorn. I didn't want to fully copy her name so I changed it. I also like the initials EG as it reminds me of my favorite professional wrestler Eddie Guerrero as a tribute to him.
Monika: Did you try wrestling yourself? Some time ago I read an article about Manami Toyota and The Fabulous Moolah, great female wrestlers, but I have never tried it myself. 
Emily: I attempted a go at it many years ago but I wasn't able to do it. I may have an interest in trying again in the present.
"When I came out I lost two of my
longest-standing male friends
of 10 and 15 years."
Monika: Do you get many questions from your social media followers? What do they ask for?
Emily: I get a lot of questions from people. I am happy to answer them but at times they can be obtrusive. I've learned over the last while to set boundaries with myself over these kinds of questions and that I don't have to reply to all of them.
Monika: We all pay the highest price for the fulfillment of our dreams to be ourselves. As a result, we lose our families, friends, jobs, and social positions. Did you pay such a high price as well? What was the hardest thing about your coming out?
Emily: When I came out I lost two of my longest-standing male friends of 10 and 15 years. I've also not spoken to family as I pushed them all away in fear of them being transphobic prior to me coming out. When the news broke of my coming out a lot of my family had not forgiven me for assuming they would hold bigoted views. I only did so out of self-preservation as I've read about so many people having their family reject them. I was only doing this to preempt things.
Monika: Was your family surprised by your transition?
Emily: I had a big traumatic breakdown in October 2019 and at that point in my life when I was pushing my family away I was shouting and screaming at them saying I wish I was away from here so you didn't know what I was doing. Some people in the family had a guess at what it was at the time so knew when I came out what the big news was. For others in the family it was a complete shock.
Monika: Are you satisfied with the effects of the hormone treatment?
Emily: I'm just about to hit my one-year HRT anniversary on the 2nd of March. I definitely can see changes. I have been a little disappointed by how long and slow the HRT process is but if I compare myself to photos of me from this point last year you can definitely see a big difference and this is something I should be proud of and not disappointed with.
Monika: We are said to be prisoners of passing or non-passing syndrome. Although cosmetic surgeries help to overcome it, we will always be judged accordingly. How can we cope with this?
Emily: Passing as cisgender is an exceptionally difficult part of the journey and it is something that we transgender people struggle with. I'm kind of starting to get lucky with my HRT that as time is going on I am able to be passable as cisgender but not always.
I think as more time passes through my HRT will make me cisgender passable all of the time. My voice does give me away a lot and for me, I find it hard with voice therapy to keep consistent with it and practice daily as I have a busy schedule.
Monika: Does the Scottish Health Service provide satisfactory services (HRT, FFS, GRS) to transgender women?
Emily: The Scottish NHS has four gender identity clinics in Aberdeen, Edinburgh, Glasgow, and Inverness. They mainly provide a diagnosis of gender incongruence, provide HRT, endocrinology and also give referrals for surgery. The waiting list times for each clinic vary. We have a public healthcare crisis with gender identity services in Scotland. I'm currently waiting 37 months for the Sandyford clinic in Glasgow. I've been told I may not get a first appointment for 11 years. I have gone private with the only private gender identity clinic in Scotland Your GP who has been amazing and supportive of me and my journey.
"It's so liberating and freeing to
wear dresses after spending so
long inside the closet."
We don't have any public health surgeons in Scotland so they have to work in partnership with the NHS in England for referral for GRS. The NHS doesn't do FFS as it's not routine surgery. You have to go private. Most Scottish trans women go abroad for it. I will have to privately pay for breast augmentation next year. I may get on the NHS someday if I get my foot in the door of electrolysis.
Monika: Do you remember the first time you saw a transgender woman on TV or met anyone transgender in person?
Emily: I met another person from here you interviewed before called Catriona who gave me some advice at the very start of the journey. It was really helpful and helped me see what was possible with going through gender transition.
Monika: Are there any transgender role models that you follow or followed?
Emily: I don't really have any trans role models as such but I do have a lot of admiration for many trans activists in Scotland who fight for my rights daily so I can have a better life.
Monika: What do you think about the present situation of transgender women in your country?
Emily: I live in Scotland. It's a pretty good country to be a transgender woman. My home city of Glasgow is safe and I haven't had any problems.
Monika: Do you like fashion? What kind of outfits do you usually wear? Any special fashion designs, colors, or trends?
Emily: I'm still trying to find myself in this respect. I'm only six months full-time as myself. I'm trying out different things but I do find I like greens and pinks as colors. I do like leather trousers and skirts and cute cozy jumpers and I'm now obsessed with wearing dresses. It's so liberating and freeing to wear dresses after spending so long inside the closet.
Monika: Do you often experiment with your makeup?
Emily: I do a basic look and I am getting good at that to make me feminine. I'm not the most confident in makeup application so I do want to go seek out a makeup artist to help me gain confidence.
Monika: By the way, do you like being complimented on your looks?
Emily: It is really nice. I love it. It affirms my gender identity.
Monika: Do you remember your first job interview or coming out conversation with your employer as a woman?
Emily: Yes I do. Fortunately, my manager at the time was an LGBT+ member so it went well. I also have a supportive workplace and we have a great LGBT+ network for support.
Monika: What would you advise to all transwomen looking for employment or transitioning at work?
Emily: Just be yourself. Most employers won't care if you are a transgender person. They are looking for the right person. If you have those skills you will be fine. Don't be nervous.
Monika: Are you involved in the life of the local LGBTQ community?
Emily: I do go to local community groups and go to a monthly coffee meet up and hang out in queer-owned coffee shops.
"I see myself now as someone who
has more confidence and self-esteem
about myself."
Monika: Could you tell me about the importance of love in your life?
Emily: I'm currently single and would like a partner. I also identify as bisexual so I find attraction in both men and women. I find I like different things about both. I would like to find someone to be my partner and soulmate. I find this would help complete me.
Monika: Many transgender ladies write their memoirs. Have you ever thought about writing such a book yourself?
Emily: It's not something I ever considered but if a publisher was interested in my life story I'd love the opportunity.
Monika: What is your next step in the present time and where do you see yourself within the next 5-7 years?
Emily: I am just seeing where my HRT journey goes. I am hoping to get breast augmentation surgery next year and I am trying to move to Edinburgh to get myself in a better place to get myself GRS surgery sooner rather than later.
Monika: What would you recommend to all transgender women that are afraid of transition?
Emily: It's a massive leap of faith. It takes a lot of courage. You just got to believe in yourself.
Monika: My pen-friend Gina Grahame wrote to me once that we should not limit our potential because of how we were born or by what we see other transgender people doing. Our dreams should not end on an operating table; that’s where they begin. Do you agree with this?
Emily: I agree with this. I see myself now as someone who has more confidence and self-esteem about myself. I hope this will allow me to go out there go and achieve the personal goals I set myself.
Monika: Emily, it was a pleasure to interview you. Thanks a lot!
Emily: Thank you so much! It's been a pleasure.

All the photos: courtesy of Emily Green.
© 2023 - Monika Kowalska

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