In the vast world of YouTube, where makeup tutorials meet life advice and courage often hides behind a camera lens, some voices shine through with raw honesty and unapologetic light. Today, I have the pleasure of speaking with ButterfLyra, known offline simply as Lyra, a radiant 20-year-old American video blogger who documents her transition journey with grace, humor, and a healthy dose of floral accessories. Lyra’s channel isn’t just a diary of hormones, hairstyles, or headbands, it’s a lifeline for countless viewers navigating their own identities.
From voice feminization tips to the deeper, scarier questions of dysphoria and self-discovery, her videos offer what the best kind of art does: recognition, reassurance, and resistance. In our conversation, Lyra opens up about the joys and trials of transition, the complexity of visibility in a society still catching up, and the power of a supportive boyfriend, a fabulous wardrobe, and a well-timed Laverne Cox sighting. Her story is not only one of personal transformation, but of giving back to the very community that helped her blossom. Let’s dive into her world, bright, bold, boho, and most importantly, free from fear.
Monika: Today, I have the pleasure of speaking with Lyra, a vibrant young American video blogger who shares her transition journey on YouTube under the name ButterfLyra. Welcome, Lyra!
Lyra: Hello Monika!
Monika: To begin, could you introduce yourself to our readers with a few words about who you are and what brings you joy?
Lyra: My name is Lyra, and I'm a 20-year-old transgender woman. I love music, fashion, flowers, and most of all, I love people. Connecting with others and making them smile has always been a passion of mine.
Monika: What motivated you to start documenting your transition online, especially considering how personal and sometimes vulnerable that process can be?
Lyra: I was tempted not to, but the reason I did was because of how inspired I felt watching other trans women who shared their transitions on YouTube. People like Violet, Princess Joules, and other amazing women really helped me discover who I was. I wanted to give back to the community that made me the person I am today. Sharing my story felt like the best way to pay that inspiration forward.
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| Free from fear. |
Monika: Your YouTube channel has attracted a growing community. What are some of the most common questions your viewers ask you?
Lyra: The most common question I get is how to start the transition. It's an odd question to answer because it varies from person to person, and I’ve made videos documenting what I did to start mine. The best I can do to help people with these kinds of questions is to remind them that they can never lose sight of who they are. Even if transition seems impossible, as long as they keep their end goal in mind, their dreams can become reality. I also try to remind them that starting doesn’t mean rushing, it’s okay to move at your own pace.
Monika: You’ve probably heard it all by now, but what’s the most unusual or challenging question you’ve ever received from your viewers?
Lyra: I receive many questions from faraway countries and from people who don’t have the most fluent English. Many of them have questions that are incredibly hard to answer and sometimes strange, usually something like, “How is it possible for a man to look like a woman?” I don’t know why I answer some of these questions, but I try to. Educating people that women come in all shapes and sizes is a big deal. Sometimes it’s more about planting a seed than changing a mind overnight.
Monika: When filming your videos, do you plan out your content in advance or take a more spontaneous approach?
Lyra: Usually, I improvise. Funnily enough, I should really be more organized with my channel and thoughts, but the channel is more of a hobby than it is a structured project. I like to just make videos that I’m inspired to make, rather than feeling like I’m forced to do something. That said, I do keep a mental list of topics I might explore when the mood strikes.
Monika: How far along would you say you are in your transition at this point?
Lyra: I am almost 3 years on estrogen, but almost 6 years into my feminization process. Transition starts before HRT, and learning skills like makeup and fashion didn’t come quickly to me. Almost 4 years ago, I went on hormone blockers, and despite my occasional doubt and dysphoria, my transition has been incredibly smooth. I underwent SRS this past November, so technically I would consider my transition complete. Then again, we women are never going to stop changing ;) Each stage has taught me something different about patience and self-love.
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| Many faces. |
Monika: Who are some transgender women that have inspired you throughout your journey?
Lyra: Laverne Cox. She is everything. I even had the privilege of meeting her while I was up at UCI. A lot of popular trans women talk the talk but don’t walk the walk. Laverne manages to represent the people that she supports and comes from in a way that a lot of celebrities don’t do once they’re famous. I also admire Carmen Carrera, Isis King, and many, many more. It’s incredibly motivating to see trans women succeed without forgetting where they came from.
Monika: What was the most difficult part of your coming-out experience?
Lyra: Coming out to myself. Denial is a strange drug, in that it's way too easy to get caught up in it and let it distract you from your true feelings. I always wanted to be a woman, ever since I was a little kid, but it was terrifying to me. Transition is one of the most terrifying things to be faced with, but once you start, stopping is even more terrifying. Never have I looked back though, I really do love what transition has brought me. Accepting who you are takes courage, but it also brings unmatched freedom.
Monika: How do you feel about the current treatment and visibility of transgender women in the U.S.?
Lyra: I am extremely worried. Even as a California baby, I suffered a lot of discrimination before reaching a certain “passable” level. Society is so vanity-obsessed that trans women who have trouble passing have a significantly harder time than trans women who don’t. And even despite that, there are still people who harass me for my identity. Politics aside, this country is emboldened to pick on minorities right now, and trans people are one of those minorities. We need to stand up for them. Change won’t happen unless we keep raising our voices and supporting each other loudly.
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| Warrior. |
Monika: How do you feel about the way transgender characters are portrayed in mainstream media, such as films, books, and news stories?
Lyra: Honestly, I don’t know of many transgender characters. The ones I do know of are often portrayed as drag queens or junkies, or a mix of both. I have trouble relating to the media’s portrayal of trans women because it doesn’t always reflect who we are.
I feel like a trans woman is just the same as any other woman, and I don’t often see trans characters who aren’t treated like some kind of alien. It would mean a lot to see more complex, human stories about us told with care and accuracy.
Monika: Do you engage in politics or advocacy? And in your opinion, can transgender women help shape political change?
Lyra: No, I am not. The closest I come to being politically active is through my Facebook page. I would be much more politically active if I felt safe. Unfortunately, I don’t really feel like politics is a safe space for trans women right now, and so my part involves voting and spreading my message as best as I can. Beyond that, I don’t feel safe. I hope one day the political landscape becomes a space where trans voices can be heard without fear.
Monika: Are you involved in any local LGBTQ+ activities or community efforts?
Lyra: I still sometimes go to local events with my LGBTQ community, but for the most part, I’m a hermit. Social energy is precious to me, so I tend to choose my outings very carefully.
Monika: Within the broader LGBTQ+ umbrella, do you feel the transgender community is able to advocate for its specific needs effectively?
Lyra: I believe so, but it’s hard because the LGBTQ community can be very divided. The queer community feels very distant from the gay community, and it can be hard to be caught between that as somebody who no longer identifies as either of those terms. Still, I believe our voices can grow stronger if we keep supporting each other across those divides.
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| Sweethearts. |
Monika: Has fashion played a role in your self-expression? What styles, colors, or trends do you love most?
Lyra: Fashion is everything. I used to work at Kohl’s, so most of my clothes are from there, but lately I’ve become a yoga geek, so my style has shifted in that direction.
My colors are almost always blues and purples, but I’ve thrown in a pink or two. Jewelry, stacks of bracelets, bangles, gems up and down, is what I’m into lately. And head accessories! Love me some boho bandanas ;) Lately, I’ve been experimenting more with layering and mixing fabrics, it helps me feel more confident in my body.
Monika: What’s your take on transgender beauty pageants? Would you ever consider participating?
Lyra: I love beauty pageants, and I would love to see or be a part of one!
They showcase not just beauty, but resilience and pride, and I think that’s really powerful.
Monika: How important is love to you, both in your relationships and in your life in general?
Lyra: I have a boyfriend of almost two years, and he is incredibly important to me. If I had it my way, I would marry the guy, but we’re going to get through college first. I also love my family very much, especially my mom.
Love has helped me stay grounded during moments of doubt, and I’m endlessly thankful for that.
Monika: Many transgender women choose to share their life stories in memoirs. Have you ever considered writing one yourself?
Lyra: Oh, I’m too young to write a memoir. Maybe once I’ve seen the world I will, but for now, I’ll stick to making my silly videos XD.
Still, I do try to document my journey in bits and pieces online, it’s my own version of a memoir for now.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender women who are scared of transitioning because of potential discrimination or hate?
Lyra: Fear is never a reason to do anything. Transitioning is going to be on your mind for a reason, and if you choose to ignore your true desire, you won’t be able to let it go. You can’t hide your identity for the sake of other people. Plus, there are many ways to “transition in stealth.” I’ve even talked about that in some of my videos.
Courage doesn’t mean you’re not scared, it just means you’re choosing to be yourself anyway.
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| "How to: Feminizing my voice as a transgender woman" via YouTube. |
Monika: What goals are you currently focusing on, and where do you envision yourself five to seven years from now?
Lyra: College. I intend to get a Bachelor’s Degree in some area of science, and I am currently finishing yoga teacher training, so I may be a realized yogi by then! Being in tune with my body and mind is very important to me.
I hope to find a path where my scientific curiosity and spiritual growth can coexist beautifully.
Monika: Some people believe that gender-affirming surgeries are not the end of a journey but the beginning of a new one. Do you agree that we should not limit our dreams based on our past or what others expect from us?
Lyra: Completely agree! The operating table is never the ending, only the beginning! There is so much to do, so much to see, so what’s wrong with taking the back streets? ;)
Life doesn’t stop when we affirm who we are, it finally starts to unfold with honesty and freedom.
Monika: Lyra, thank you so much for sharing your story with me today.
Lyra: Thank you so much for choosing to interview me! I am both honored and thankful for your time, and I wish you the best.
It truly means a lot to be heard and to hopefully inspire others who are just beginning their journey.
All the photos: courtesy of Lyra.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
