Meeting Marissa Alexa McCool is like stepping into a world where words are electric, emotions unapologetically raw, and courage is worn as elegantly as eyeliner. A vibrant force in the transgender and neurodivergent communities, Marissa is a proud trans woman whose voice resonates across books, podcasts, and stages alike. Based in Saint Paul, Minnesota, she is a loving mother of two, a devoted spouse, a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania (cum laude, no less), and a fierce advocate for visibility and justice. A storyteller by instinct and craft, Marissa was typing before she could tie her shoes, dreaming up characters and conversations that would later come alive in her novels, essays, and public performances. Whether exploring the pain and poetry of identity in Passing Cars: The Internal Monologue of a Neurodivergent Trans Girl, speaking out against bigotry in The PC Lie: How American Voters Decided I Don’t Matter, or weaving the ache of adolescence into fiction like False Start, Marissa creates space for voices so often pushed to the margins. Her work doesn’t just reflect her life, it becomes a lifeline for readers searching for representation, reflection, or simply the comfort of not being alone.
As a public speaker, podcaster, and community builder, Marissa is radiant and relentless. She’s not afraid to raise her voice, whether it’s to a hate preacher or a packed auditorium, and she does so not for attention, but to deflect the fire from others who may not have the safety or privilege she’s fought hard to secure. Her activism is deeply personal, born of trauma, transformation, and an unwavering desire to make the world more livable for the next generation of trans kids. Marissa’s journey is one of defiance and discovery. From coming out in the aftermath of the Pulse nightclub shooting to co-founding the Trans Podcaster Visibility Initiative, she has turned grief into grit, silence into stage presence, and marginalization into meaningful change. And through it all, her message remains beautifully clear: we exist, we matter, and our stories are worth telling. It is my heartfelt honor to share this conversation with Marissa Alexa McCool, a woman whose presence is as powerful as her prose, and whose light continues to reach those still searching for their own.
Monika: Today, I have the great pleasure and honor of interviewing Marissa Alexa McCool, an American LGBT-rights activist, public speaker, prolific podcast host (including The Inciting Incident Podcast), author, mother, columnist, and stage performer. Marissa is the author of Passing Cars: The Internal Monologue of a Neurodivergent Trans Girl (2017), along with four other books. Welcome, Marissa!
Marissa: Hi Monika! Thank you so much for reaching out, it's truly a pleasure to be here. I’ve been looking forward to this conversation and really appreciate the chance to share my story with your readers.
Monika: Marissa, you are a woman of many talents, activist, writer, performer, podcast host, and more. How do you usually introduce yourself to someone who’s never heard of your work? And out of all the things you do, has writing always been the most central to your identity?
Marissa: I don’t know if I can rank my interests by importance, but perhaps I can by longevity. But let me answer your other questions first: I’m 32. I graduated cum laude from the University of Pennsylvania with degrees in English, Cinema and Media Arts, and Anthropology. I live in Saint Paul, Minnesota with my husband, partner, and two children.
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| Available via Amazon. |
Monika: That’s a wonderfully diverse academic background. When did writing first become such a significant part of your life?
Marissa: Writing is the interest I’ve been pursuing for as long as I can remember. I learned to type when I was four years old, and I can remember using a word processor as a young child to create stories involving people I knew. As I grew up, I used that imagination in role-playing stories, and I couldn’t imagine pursuing anything else when it came to university focus. I was able to learn from some amazing professors, including Meta Mazaj, Kathy Van Cleve, and Marion Kant, and I don’t know where I’d be without them.
Monika: Your first book, The PC Lie: How American Voters Decided I Don't Matter (2016), came out during a time of intense political upheaval in the United States. What pushed you to write it so quickly and directly after the election?
Marissa: I wrote that book shortly after the U.S. Presidential Election. I attended the same university as the man who was unfortunately elected president, so a lot of us were surrounded by that rhetoric even more than the rest of the country. As I walked around my own country feeling terrified for a few days, it came to a head the Monday after when all the Black freshmen were added to a lynching group on Facebook.
I started writing in class, and before I knew it, I had 30 pages. I wrote the book in nine days and never looked back. I had it published before the end of the year, and it contained my initial rant as well as personal essays and attempts to make sense of a country that would use such animosity to put so many of its citizens in deliberate danger. It felt urgent and personal in a way no previous writing experience had ever been.
Monika: That’s an incredibly intense and fast writing process. Did working on the book help you feel less isolated in such a polarized political moment?
Marissa: I reached out to a lot of people to contribute to the book, and one of my personal heroes, Chris Kluwe, was among the first to agree to write something. What I saw more than anything was that I wasn’t alone, and that motivated me as much as anything to continue to speak out. It may seem weird that telling the story of my non-traditional wedding exists in the same book where I’m dropping f-bombs every other sentence, but I’ve never been much for following expectations. That contrast between the personal and the political is what made the book truly feel like my own voice.
Monika: Your novel False Start (2017) begins as a coming-of-age story centered around Logan and Ezra, set against the backdrop of Logan’s father being deployed to Afghanistan. But as the plot unfolds, readers discover deeper layers, including a transgender narrative twist. What inspired you to craft this particular story?
Marissa: False Start is a story that I used to tell many of the stories I had growing up while trying to learn who I was. It’s hard to say that there’s one character who inhabited these the most, but growing up in a conservative area while being obviously feminine was not the safest place to be. The novel became a way for me to process both real memories and imagined possibilities, blending truth with fiction in ways that still surprise me.
Monika: One of the novel’s strengths is how it brings in trans representation and mental health struggles without turning them into clichés. Was this a deliberate creative decision?
Marissa: It’s always been important to me to include trans people in my stories, because in mainstream media, if they’re included at all, they’re punch lines. Jokes. Or serial killers. I try to create representation for my community without their entire identity revolving around the fact that they are trans, because that’s how most of us live our lives. It’s also vital to me to confront the realities of mental illness without making that the joke.
Logan, the main character, appears to have everything on the surface but is unable to find anyone willing to listen to him when he reaches out about the issues he’s facing. Too many people in this world aren’t willing to make space for others, whether that be for trans people, those with mental illnesses, or those just trying to find their own way. That’s what makes storytelling powerful to me: the chance to create the empathy people often refuse to offer in real life.
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| Available via Amazon. |
Monika: Your 2017 book Silent Dreams is a deeply personal collection of essays and poems that you once described as “a set of essays and poems from a public transgirl.” What motivated you to compile such an intimate and varied body of work?
Marissa: Truthfully, my coming-out piece was The PC Lie, as I went from closeted to public almost overnight with the speed and ferocity in which it was written. Silent Dreams features many of the performance pieces I wrote, including the one that’s read really fast that I tend to open my speeches with (Ode to the Blocked) and the original piece I wrote and performed for The Vagina Monologues (Once Unspoken). It gave me a platform to showcase my spoken-word voice in print and to reconnect with pieces that had only lived in performance form until then.
Monika: You’ve described Silent Dreams as a good starting point for readers new to your work. What do you think makes it especially accessible?
Marissa: It also included some of the pieces I wrote for school and other articles I had featured. This was a good book to have on hand for someone who wants to quickly become familiar with my work, or maybe someone who doesn’t have the time to read a novel or a whole book of essays like The PC Lie or Passing Cars. I’ve found that the compact nature of it has had a lot of emotional impact on my readers. Many people have told me it helped them feel seen in just a few pages, and that’s more than I could ever hope for.
Monika: Your 2017 novel Voice in the Dark blends youthful rebellion with emotional depth. Did you intentionally include a transgender character to bring more visibility to trans experiences?
Marissa: There is a trans man in the story named Jesse. He struggles with being bullied for appearing too feminine as a boy, and it ends up getting out of hand in multiple ways. He takes matters into his own hands after being encouraged to stand up for himself by the main character, Lucas, and that’s what really kickstarts the story. His arc was important to me because I wanted to reflect the complexity of trans masculinity, something often overlooked in mainstream storytelling.
Monika: Beyond representation, what cultural or artistic influences helped shape the tone and atmosphere of the book?
Marissa: I grew up on the counterculture stories and narratives of the ’80s and ’90s, like Pump Up the Volume, Empire Records, Heathers, and Daria, and this was sort of my love letter to that particular style. I haven’t felt like it’s been represented in the American mainstream much since September 11th, as at that point, not being part of the crowd was no longer welcomed and dissent was criticized and categorized as un-American.
I didn’t feel like there were stories “for me” anymore, so I decided to write one that mirrored the ones I grew up on, for those who didn’t have any real interest in the standard, traditional tropes, either in stories or real life. Not that there’s anything wrong with those; they were just never for me. Writing Voice in the Dark felt like reclaiming a space for the misfits and outliers, the ones whose stories rarely get told with heart and nuance.
Monika: Your book Passing Cars: The Internal Monologue of a Neurodivergent Trans Girl (2017) offers deeply personal reflections. What inspired you to revisit key moments in your life through such a unique lens?
Marissa: It’s not just reflecting on those pivotal moments, but it’s also comparing the thoughts I was having at the time against what they are now. For instance, the struggles I had as a teenager make a lot more sense when viewed through the lens of trying to discover my gender identity and being untreated for autism, but I didn’t know that at the time, so it came out as being rebellious and unwilling to cooperate with others. Looking back with greater understanding helped me extend more compassion toward my younger self, and I hope it encourages others to do the same.
Monika: The book also includes contributions from other voices. How did that collaborative aspect shape the final result?
Marissa: I had a great variety of contributing writers talk about some of their own pivotal moments, thus giving various different perspectives to this idea. The chapters and pieces are arranged according to the five stages of grief, and that was a suggestion and decision made by my publisher, Wyrmwood Publishing. They’ve worked with me in some capacity for all five of the books I’ve published since coming out, and I couldn’t be more grateful. Their support helped transform Passing Cars into something far more communal and emotionally resonant than I could have created on my own.
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| In Santa Monica, CA. Photo credit: Kayla Hunt Currivan. |
Monika: As someone who is very visible in the public eye, how do you use your platform to support other trans women, especially those who may not have the same visibility or safety?
Marissa: A lot of what I do when it comes to putting myself out there is trying to answer many of the initial questions that cis people tend to have so that other trans people don’t have to. Sometimes a lack of empathy is evident in their reactions, especially when someone thinks they’re “just asking a question,” but in reality, it might be the ninth time I’ve answered it that day. It takes energy to hold space like that repeatedly, but I remind myself that every time I do, I’m potentially sparing someone else from having to.
Monika: Has that sense of responsibility influenced how you navigate public interactions and activism?
Marissa: I’m six feet tall with purple hair, so I draw a lot of attention. But that’s what made me come out by screaming in the face of a hate preacher in the first place: I can handle it. If I can draw the fire away from those who don’t have the support structure or relative stability that I’m privileged enough to have, I feel like I’m helping by adding a positive voice out there in the mainstream.
The biggest thing we can do is normalize being trans in the eyes of as many people as possible so that the younger generation of trans kids doesn’t have to face the same difficulties we did, just as previous generations paved the way for us. I’ve come to see visibility not just as exposure, but as a shield I can offer others when they need it most.
Monika: When did you first begin to sense that your identity didn’t align with how others saw you, and what early signs pointed you toward womanhood?
Marissa: I’ve always been a woman, but most people didn’t know that. In retrospect, it makes a lot of sense. I always related to women better; I never really hung out with a lot of boys, nor did I have any interest in doing so. I wore makeup, wanted to be one of the girls, and was always particularly feminine and attracted to feminine energy. Even before I understood what being transgender meant, I felt most at ease when I could express myself freely and authentically.
Monika: What obstacles did you face when trying to come out, and how did you eventually begin your transition?
Marissa: It was difficult in the sense that I tried multiple times before the time that became successful. In 2014, when I was 29, I was coming out and flourishing until I was sexually assaulted twice a week, and that made me go into hiding for almost two years. It was the Pulse shooting in Orlando that became the impetus for my coming out. There were many false starts, but I kept coming back to myself because the truth of who I am couldn’t be silenced forever.
END OF PART 1
All the photos: courtesy of Marissa Alexa McCool.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
