Monika: How do you view the way news media currently covers transgender issues, especially in the context of political debates and legislation?
Rachael: Unfortunately, news stories are rife right now with state legislators passing “bathroom bills” to keep transgender people out of bathrooms that match their gender identity. These bills are passed out of ignorance and fear, assuming that transgender women are nothing more than men in dresses looking for some sort of thrill in a ladies’ room.
Monika: How do these laws impact the transgender community differently based on whether someone is transitioning from female to male or male to female?
Rachael: This is a double-edged sword in the trans community. Female-to-male transgender people can “pass” as male much more easily than male-to-females. Given hormone treatment, trans men grow beards and mustaches, their voices lower, and they take on male characteristics. But their surgical remedies are not so simple. For male-to-females, after hormone therapy, their voices do not raise, their beards do not go away, and they usually retain male facial characteristics that can only be changed through facial feminization surgery.
Monika: How do societal expectations about masculinity and femininity worsen these challenges?
Rachael: This is all exacerbated by the “good old boy” mentality that insists if you are a man, you must be uber-macho. You are considered sick if you are anything else. So if you do not “pass” well as a trans woman and you try to enter a ladies’ room, people assume you must have ulterior motives. Unfortunately, these same people do not look around to see how many cis women do not look particularly feminine themselves, so a lot of people are hurt by these short-sighted and cruel laws.
Monika: How do you feel about the media portrayal of high-profile transgender figures like Caitlyn Jenner?
Rachael: One of my biggest disappointments about media coverage of trans people is the story of Caitlyn Jenner. It does not show people what being transgender is really all about. Think about it. One day on TV she is Bruce Jenner being interviewed by Diane Sawyer. The next month she shows up as a glamorous figure on the cover of Vanity Fair. Then her TV program shows her at any of her many mansions worrying about her greatest problem, which is deciding what designer outfit to wear from closets full of them.
Monika: What message do you wish the public understood about the realities of being transgender compared to these media portrayals?
Rachael: Being transgender is not a magic act. It does not happen overnight, and the people going through it can hardly afford electrolysis, let alone facial feminization surgery and designer clothes. Additionally, Caitlyn holds tightly to her conservative political stances, seemingly unaware of what conservatives in this country continue to do to limit or destroy LGBT rights. She is clueless and does not represent real transgender people.
Monika: You’ve written extensively about your transgender experience, but can you tell us about the other kinds of books and poetry you create?
Rachael: I have a website for my books and poetry called rachaelbooth.wix.com where I list my books, what I’m working on, and even share my poetry for anyone to read. I wrote a lot of poetry during my darkest times before coming out, so some of it isn’t very cheerful, but it reflects what I was feeling when I wrote it. I actually incorporated some of my poems in my autobiography because they helped show the despair I was experiencing at different points in my life. Some of my poems, however, were inspired by the wonders I witnessed in nature while backpacking in the mountains, something I used to do frequently.
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| Rachael's books webpage.(Offline) |
Monika: Can you tell us about some of the new projects you are working on now?
Rachael: Right now I’m writing a completely different kind of book. It is the history of the tiny town I grew up in Ohio, titled “The Little Port in the Cornfields – a History of Evansport, Ohio.” Researching it has been fascinating. Evansport was actually a little port in the cornfields, founded on a river where farmers and loggers could bring their products to a grist mill and sawmill for processing, and then float them down the river to trains at a nearby town to be sent to Toledo and across Lake Erie. A direct cousin of Francis Scott Key had a shop there in the town’s heyday. I’m really enjoying writing this. I’ve also been developing a time-travel science fiction novel and a novel exploring the idea that professional sports are rigged from the very start of the season. This new direction in my life has been a lot of fun.
Monika: Are you personally involved in any advocacy or lobbying efforts, and how do you see the role of transgender women in shaping politics?
Rachael: I absolutely am. Here in New Hampshire, we’ve already had a transgender woman elected as a state Representative. Unfortunately, she was found to have engaged in some questionable activities and was removed from office. The good news is that it didn’t seem to reflect negatively on her being a trans-woman.
Monika: Did you ever consider running for office yourself?
Rachael: I had intended to run for a state Representative seat this year myself, but I had to decline due to health issues that would have prevented me from doing what was necessary to win. With the increasing visibility of transgender people, I do see a transgender candidate being elected to office in the near future. Kristin Beck, the transgender former Seal Team member, is currently running to try to unseat the 30-year Democratic veteran Steny Hoyer in the Maryland primaries.
Monika: How do you view transgender beauty pageants, especially considering the criticism that they may encourage an unhealthy focus on youth and physical appearance?
Rachael: I personally think that all beauty pageants are demeaning to women. Any contest that pits one woman against another solely on her looks totally dismisses what it really means to be a woman. The more we continue these stereotypes, the harder it is for women to rise above these things that keep us down. On the other hand, I personally know some drop-dead gorgeous trans-women who I would confidently put up against any cis-woman in a beauty contest if I believed in them.
Monika: Could you tell me about the importance of love in your life?
Monika: How did your understanding of love and relationships evolve during your transition, and what role did it play in your life? Rachael: There were two things in my life that I didn’t even think about when I was considering transition – my love life and my sexual orientation after surgery. I didn’t care about the first and I didn’t know about the second. I was convinced that being transgender meant I would never again find love and that I would live alone for the rest of my life. I had made that okay with myself. But I’ve never been one to give up trying.
Monika: How did you approach dating while you were transitioning, and what precautions did you take?
Rachael: During the year I was in transition I purposely stayed away from any dating at all. I knew far too many transwomen who had been beaten and nearly killed by men they were dating who found out they weren’t “fully” female yet. That was not going to happen to me. After my surgery, I joined a dating service and started dating men because that was what was expected of me by society. Sometimes you just never learn.
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| Rachael's first glamour shot. |
Monika: When did you realize that dating men was not right for you, and how did you discover what felt right?
Rachael: Dating men just wasn’t right for me. Kissing a man was like kissing my dad and didn’t excite me at all. I then started dating women and found that was exactly what felt right. The next hurdle was to find out when to tell a prospective partner about my past.
Monika: How did you decide when and how to tell your partner about your past?
Rachael: There are two trains of thought about this – tell a person right off the bat who you are so that they don’t feel you’ve been lying to them, or let them get to know you first and if you fall in love, then tell them and see if the love is strong enough to survive this knowledge. I chose the latter.
Monika: What happened when you finally shared your truth with her?
Rachael: When my girlfriend and I had been together for about a year and had fallen deeply in love with each other, I had to draw on my inner strength one more time and tell her about who I used to be. I had never been more frightened in my life. She said she needed to think about it and would get back to me in a week or so. I thought she was gone forever. Two days later she asked me to bring my clothes over so I could have clean clothes to wear to work the next day. She is now my wife and we just celebrated our 20th anniversary with a motorcycle ride to Nova Scotia last summer.
Monika: What creative projects are you focusing on these days?
Rachael: Right now I’m throwing myself into writing. I’m trying to restart my old classes in Women’s Self-Defense and Assault Prevention. I may no longer be able to do martial arts because of my physical disabilities, but I can still teach self-defense. It doesn’t require advanced martial arts skills.
Monika: Are you learning anything new outside of writing and teaching?
Rachael: I’m teaching myself German because languages have always intrigued me. I already speak Mandarin Chinese, Arabic, and Spanish, and I can get by in French with a basic knowledge of Russian and Japanese. I also wanted to prove to myself that my mind can still learn new languages. So far “Alles gut”!
Monika: How else are you using your time to give back or stay engaged with your community?
Rachael: I volunteer at a local ski resort to teach other disabled people to ski. When we moved to New Hampshire, I had the chance to help others while continuing to enjoy skiing myself. This is now my sixth year volunteering. I also play guitar and sing for patients at a local hospital and at a local assisted living home. For years, my love for performing kept me from believing I could ever become a whole person. I always thought that once I transitioned, the first time I strummed my guitar and sang in public, people would point and laugh at the male voice coming from a kind-of-female-looking performer. As it turned out, that was just another excuse I used to postpone the inevitable.
Monika: How did you handle people’s reactions to your voice after your transition?
Rachael: The first time I performed in public I received great applause and numerous compliments on how pretty my voice was. My voice really hasn’t changed all that much, other than some diction lessons I took during my transition to speak in a more feminine timbre. I never had a particularly low voice, but my language skills, along with vocal coaching, have allowed me to sing the way I’ve always wanted to. In high school, I had to sing tenor because boys weren’t allowed to sing alto. I now sing alto in a local chorus and in another women’s group.
Monika: Have you found other ways to support and connect with the transgender community?
Rachael: I’ve also started a Facebook group called the North Country Transgender Support Group to help other transgender people find assistance and friendship so they don’t feel so alone, and to locate local medical and psychological resources that others have used. My group covers northern New Hampshire, Vermont, and Maine. I can honestly say I’ve never been happier in my life.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria and the challenges of growing up?
Rachael: My greatest advice to others is to never give up. Don’t let anyone bring you down because of how you feel inside. You alone know what’s right for you. There comes a time when you have to stand on your own two feet and not let yourself be governed by what other people think. When I made the decision myself, it was the most freeing moment of my life. Nothing anyone could say would upset me anymore. It may have taken me forty years to get there, but I’m from a different generation.
Monika: How has medical progress changed the experience for younger transgender people today?
Rachael: The world is open to all of us now, with help at every step. There are even doctors who administer hormone blockers to transgender children so that girls don’t start menstruating or developing breasts, and so boys’ voices don’t lower, grow beards, or bulk up at puberty. I wish I had had that when I was young, but if I had even thought about saying anything to anyone as a child, I risked hospitalization or even lobotomy.
Monika: What role do you think advocacy and visibility play in supporting future generations of transgender people?
Rachael: We all have a duty to speak up about our lives and let people know that we’re real people with a different kind of problem that needs to be addressed. Every voice out there makes it easier for those coming after us.
Monika: Rachael, thank you for the interview!
END OF PART 2
All photos: courtesy of Rachael Evelyn Booth.
© 2016 - Monika Kowalska
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