Monika: Many transgender women have a variety of experiences with hormone therapy. Looking back, how do you feel about the physical and emotional effects it’s had on you?
Daniela: I’m very happy with the changes. My skin and its texture have smoothed out. My face has transformed. My hair has grown, and body hair has almost completely disappeared. I no longer produce sperm, which had caused me a lot of dysphoria. I’ve started to like my voice, which I had hated my whole life because it didn’t sound masculine enough. I have beautiful small breasts, and my hips have rounded out.
Sex is much better, because in bed I feel confident, and I experience sexual desire completely differently now that testosterone no longer flows through me. Suddenly I can flirt naturally and enjoy myself. Everything has fallen into place, and I like myself more. When I look in the mirror, I like what I see. It’s finally me. And suddenly I’m smiling. Energetically, I’ve unblocked myself, and energy is finally flowing back to me as well.
Monika: The journey to being our true selves often comes with a heavy price, losing friends, family, and sometimes even our jobs. What was the hardest part of coming out for you, and how did you navigate it?
Daniela: I lost a few very close friends who couldn’t accept it. But at the same time, I met new friends. I have a new trans family, I enjoy meeting with the girls and sharing experiences. The hardest part is probably the fact that while I am finally myself, for many people the concept of transition is still so incomprehensible that they perceive me the opposite way, they think I’m pretending to be something I’m not. Sometimes I get tired of explaining this over and over. And also of explaining that it’s not a choice and that I’m not doing it to be interesting.
Monika: Many of us feel the pressure to look as 100% women, and even after surgeries, society keeps judging us. How do you personally deal with the outside world’s expectations?
Daniela: Sometimes a reaction from someone upsets me, but I stopped worrying long ago about whether I’ll have perfect passing or not. Being misgendered doesn’t unsettle me. I’ve accepted that I’ll always have some typically male traits. I’m 188 centimeters tall, wear size 45 shoes, my voice isn’t exactly girlish, and above all, I have a very dominant profession! So I take myself as I am, and long ago accepted that I will never meet the stereotypical expectations most people have of women. I’m unique, and I’m not going to be ashamed of it. Some people see me as a woman, and for others I will always be a man. There’s nothing I can do about that.
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| Photo by Alžběta Jungrová. |
Monika: What are your thoughts on the current situation for transgender women in your country?
Daniela: It’s improving. We are more visible, and suddenly there are successful people among us, so we can be role models of sorts. As I already said, we overturned the fundamental injustice, the official castration requirement, in our favor. But there is still a lot of work to do. Everyone focuses only on medical transition, but it’s important to talk about the fact that a trans person is primarily striving for social transition.
Our country is still very conservative, if you are trans, you have to change completely! Non-binary people have helped a lot, because they brought some confusion, which paradoxically loosened overall thinking. It’s up to each of us what exactly we do with our bodies. Some want all the surgeries in the world, some don’t even want hormones. And both approaches are perfectly valid. It’s just our bodies!
Unfortunately, the trans community itself is very divided on this. The conservative ones, usually older, call for full transition. Those who don’t undergo it are, according to them, just sexual predators or perverts. Younger people approach it more freely. But progress is being made. Unfortunately, you can’t say the same about present-day America.
Monika: I remember the time right after my transition, it was pure euphoria. My closet is still full of dresses and shoes that I literally bought by the dozens back then, and I must have tried on hundreds. I felt like I had to make up for all those years that were taken from me. Did you feel the same way?
Daniela: Yes, I have fifty handbags and I’m still buying new clothes. I feel like a little child in a candy shop.
Monika: How would you describe your personal style? Do you follow any specific fashion trends, or do you have go-to outfits that make you feel confident?
Daniela: I prefer pants and unisex clothing. I love heels, but they aren’t very practical. I wear dresses only very occasionally, but I enjoy it all the more when I do. I like denim and leather jackets. I never went through that “girly” phase. Maybe that’s because I came out so late.
Monika: Do you love playing around with makeup, or is it more of a “throw on the basics and go” kind of vibe for you?
Daniela: It depends. I take makeup as a ritual, a time for myself. Sometimes I really play with it, and other times I just slap on some tried-and-true basics and go. I’ve loved creams my whole life. I don’t use liquid foundation or powder at all. I don’t like masks, only on stage!
Monika: By the way, do you like being complimented on your looks? Do you find it easy to accept compliments, or do you struggle with believing them?
Daniela: I like receiving them, and I really appreciate every compliment. Czechs are very sincere and don’t give compliments lightly. The most pleasant, of course, are from men.
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| For Beauty. |
Monika: Did you ever feel pressure to meet a certain ideal of femininity, like I did by trying to look like the women around me?
Daniela: At first, yes, but time teaches you. I want to be the ideal of myself, not some generally accepted model. I’m a trans woman, and I will always be unclassifiable because of that. Besides, I’ve never followed the crowd.
Monika: What was the most surprising part of your transition, something you never expected, whether good or bad?
Daniela: That I became a sexual object. And that I have to be careful about my safety in public. I never had to deal with that as a man.
Monika: How has love shaped your life and your journey as a transgender woman? Could you share what role love plays in your personal growth and happiness?
Daniela: Love is a powerful driving force. I keep falling in love. At the same time, I imagine that romantic, lifelong love. The gay world and its relaxed sexual boundaries never suited me in this regard. I am faithful to the end. And through love and partnership, I also realized that I am a woman!
Monika: Finally, what’s next for Daniela? What dreams and goals are you working toward now?
Daniela: I’ve really expanded my artistic horizons lately. Besides directing, where I’m exploring new genres and directions, I’ve also returned to acting, wrote a book, and will be leading acting workshops at DAMU. I’m open to everything that comes my way.
Monika: Daniela, thank you so much for sharing your journey and insights.
Daniela: Thanks to you too, and I wish you all the best.
All the photos: courtesy of Daniela Špinar.
Main photo by Alžběta Jungrová.
© 2025 - Monika Kowalska
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