Monika: Are the old stereotypes finally losing their grip?
Julia: Oh sure, the stereotypes still abound, but thanks to people like Jamie Clayton (“Hung”) and Laverne Cox (“Orange Is the New Black”), that image is shifting. As more of us come up and out, more stories will unfold. We, as a community, are adding dimension to what it means to be transgender. Each time we produce a product that presents us as multi-dimensional, we break down preconceived thoughts that straight folks might have had about us.
Monika: The transgender cause is usually presented together with the other LGBT communities. As the last letter in the abbreviation, can the transgender community promote its own cause within the group?
Julia: I’m glad you asked this question because it’s an important one, I think. Speaking for myself only, my feeling is that the “Ls and the Gs” would be much happier if we would just disappear from their lives. I can’t speak to the “Bs” because I’ve never actually met one. I think that they are mythical creatures, like the Yeti, yet they STILL show up before we do in the abbreviation! We were sort of lumped together with the Ls and Gs because, to be honest, I don’t think the press knew what to do with us. The L and G community tolerates us like an unwanted stepchild, and it seems the only time they do rally to support us is when one of us is killed. Great press opportunity, you see.
Monika: Has that changed the way you take part in LGBT events?
Julia: I’ve stopped going to LGBT functions, as have many of my trans acquaintances, because we feel like we are always ignored or under-represented. What’s happening now is that thanks to social media, we trans folk are discovering that we aren’t alone in the world and finally, FINALLY organizing away from the rainbow banner. And that’s a wonderful thing!
Monika: Politics is another arena where change happens. Are you active in it, perhaps through lobbying campaigns, and can transgender women make a difference there?
Julia: OMG, active? NO! I have a very low tolerance for pretense, lies, and bullshit (laughing). I do try to stay informed though, for my job and as a citizen. And I vote, whenever and wherever possible. Everyone can make a difference in politics, including trans folk! For instance, I have an acquaintance who will be the first trans delegate to the Democratic National Convention, and I’m very proud of her. As time marches on, you will see more of us running for office and serving in all aspects of government. Yay for her!
Monika: What role does love play in your life?
Julia: When I was transitioning, I was filled with a lot of anger toward myself, those who had shunned me, and most especially, God. It was eating me up and could have very easily turned to hate. The problem was that my hate accomplished nothing. The only person it hurt was me. What I discovered through reading was that there really is only one absolute truth in the universe, and it is love. If you love everyone and everything, then there is no reason for any other emotion. And the most important person in the world to love is yourself. Do I get angry? Sure, sometimes. I’m only human, after all. But my anger is usually very short-lived. I have trained myself to get rid of those feelings quickly. I suspect that your question pertained more toward romantic love. I have no desire for that at this time in my life. I’m way too busy loving everyone else! (laughing)
|
| America’s Got Talent 2016 Julia Scotti Geriatric Comic. Popcorn. Source: YouTube. |
Monika: Does fashion matter to you? Tell us what you usually wear, and whether any designs, colors, or trends stand out.
Julia: I’m almost embarrassed to answer this one! I guess I didn’t inherit the passion for fashion. On stage, I always wear pants and a nice top. Feminine, but not over the top and not very colorful (bright colors distract the audience). Offstage, I’m a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal. As for special designs, anything from the Beatrice Arthur collections suits me!
Monika: Many transgender women tell their stories in memoirs. Have you ever considered writing a book of your own?
Julia: Actually, I have written a book. It’s called Chasing Normal, and it is currently being shopped around to publishers via my literary agent. There are some things happening with it, but I can’t really talk about them right now. Hopefully, I’ll have some good news in the near future.
Monika: What new projects are on your horizon?
Julia: In addition to always adding new material to my act, I am preparing a one-woman show called “The Woman with XY Vision.” I’ll be trying out bits of it at various venues over the next few months. I’m also working on another book. Other than that, nothing.
Monika: Many transgender girls struggle with gender dysphoria. What would you recommend to them?
Julia: Just this: You didn’t ask for this, but it is your destiny. Embrace it with all your heart and love yourself. If you try to avoid it in order to make everyone around you happy, you will never be happy with yourself. Love yourself enough to be yourself. Nothing is insurmountable. If anything, this experience will help you find more courage than you ever thought you had. If you can get through to the other side of being transgender, you will be able to accomplish anything. Love yourself for your courage.
Monika: What about the people who hurt them along the way, and the days when it all feels too heavy?
Julia: Forgive everyone who hurts you. You don’t have to see them again, but get rid of the hate you might have for them. Chalk it up to their ignorance, but love them anyway. Fill your heart with joy and positivity. Love yourself. This thing is a blessing and a curse at times. Focus on the blessings part. Carry yourself with grace, dignity, and pride at all times. Love yourself. Never, NEVER feel less than anyone else because you are transgender. Demand respect. You are beautiful always. Love who you are and love yourself.
Monika: Is there anything practical you would add for the hardest days?
Julia: Pay forward any kindness shown to you. It brings positivity into your life. Love yourself this way. Keep a journal. Look back at it as time goes by and see how far you’ve come. There is a beginning, middle, and end to every story. You may be in a bad chapter right now, but it will end. When you feel alone and afraid, go to yourself for comfort. There is light for you when all of this is over. I am living proof of that. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. Bless you, Monika, and keep up the good work. We need more like you out there!
Monika: Julia, thank you so much for this wonderful conversation!
END OF PART 2
All photos: courtesy of Julia Scotti.
© 2014 - Monika Kowalska
No comments:
Post a Comment