Monika: During the early stages of your transition, were there any transgender role models who inspired or guided you?
Nika: I met a few girls who really inspired me through social media and LGBT meetings. Randi-Lee, Ianna, Sophia, and Michelle, among others, were very helpful in my decision-making. Laura Jane Grace and Lana Wachowski were also very inspirational to me because of their alternative style, courage, and creativity.
Monika: Today, are there any transgender women whom you continue to admire and respect for their courage and achievements?
Nika: All those I mentioned before and every single one who has the courage to come out and live their lives authentically despite social pressure. Their bravery inspires me daily and reminds me that living openly is a powerful act of self-love. I also admire how many of them support and uplift each other within the community, creating networks of strength and solidarity. Seeing their impact on society and culture motivates me to continue pursuing my own path with confidence and creativity.
Monika: Reflecting on your own experience, what was the most difficult part of coming out as transgender?
Nika: I was afraid of losing credibility in my work or of becoming unlovable. I was wrong. Over time, I realized that being true to myself actually strengthened my relationships and deepened my connections with others. Coming out taught me resilience and helped me develop a stronger sense of self-worth. It also opened opportunities I never imagined, both personally and professionally, and showed me that authenticity attracts the right kind of people into your life.
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| Costume for DragQueen Event. |
Monika: The transgender cause is often highlighted alongside other LGBT issues. Do you think the transgender community is able to promote its own voice and priorities within the broader LGBT movement?
Nika: I think so. But let's not forget that many transgender people also identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual. Over the past two years, there has been a wave of media attention on transgender issues and rights. People like Laverne Cox and Janet Mock are doing an incredible job raising awareness for our cause and inspiring positive change. Their visibility and advocacy have opened doors for more nuanced conversations about gender identity. This attention helps educate the public and encourages policy changes that directly benefit the transgender community.
Monika: Are you personally active in politics or involved in lobbying efforts, and do you believe transgender women can make a difference in political life?
Nika: Everybody can make a difference. I wouldn't say that I am currently active in the political scene, but that might change one day. Michelle Blanc, for instance, is someone who actively participates in Quebec’s political landscape. Through her presence, she makes a bold statement, but even more importantly, she does so with her ideas. I believe that the involvement of transgender women in politics brings much-needed perspectives and advocacy to public discussions. Even small contributions can ripple out to create meaningful change in society.
Monika: Fashion is often a form of self-expression. How do you approach your own style, and what kinds of outfits do you enjoy wearing?
Nika: Arrrggg.... I love fashion! Maybe a bit too much. I love funky designs and colorful clothes, although I also love all black. Before studying painting, I attended fashion school for two semesters, and after that, I studied hairdressing. I play a lot with clothing and I am not afraid of making strong fashion statements… actually, I love them! I was very eccentric as a teen, and I have kept some of that spirit. The chic/glam rock style is probably my favorite. Fashion for me is not just about appearance; it is a way to communicate personality and creativity. I enjoy experimenting with textures, patterns, and accessories to create looks that are both bold and meaningful.
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| Starting transition. Picture by Stefanie Walk. |
Monika: How would you describe the role of love in your life and its impact on your personal journey?
Nika: I think love is primordial for humans, and it is the same for me, although I was not allowing myself to fall in love or even to feel before my transition. I was shutting down all my emotions out of fear of being hurt or simply fear of being myself. Recently, I have been able to open up my heart again, which has allowed me to connect more deeply with others. My nature is very passionate, and that can be intimidating for some people. But I love to love. Love gives me strength, joy, and inspiration, and it influences my art and creativity in ways I could not imagine before. It has taught me patience, empathy, and the importance of vulnerability in building authentic relationships.
Monika: Many transgender women choose to write memoirs. Have you ever considered writing one yourself?
Nika: Maybe one day, but I still need to cultivate more wisdom in order to make it truly relevant. Writing a memoir requires reflection and experience, and I want to ensure I have enough insight to share a meaningful story. I hope that, when the time comes, I can provide guidance, inspiration, and honesty to others through my words.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria?
Nika: Meet people online and in groups. Seek a therapist and get informed. Don't judge yourself, and be gentle with yourself. Remember that you are not alone and that support networks can make a huge difference. Give yourself time and patience, and focus on understanding and accepting your own feelings.
Monika: Nika, thank you so much for sharing your time and thoughts with us.
END OF PART 2
All photos: courtesy of Nika Fontaine.
Main photo credits: Alessandra Mannisi.
© 2015 - Monika Kowalska
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