Monika: Are you currently involved in any political or lobbying campaigns related to transgender rights?
Robin: I haven’t been as politically active in recent years as I was in the past, though I do believe in the old activist saying, “If you can’t show up, send cash!” I did participate in the Women’s March in January and brought together a group of women from various parts of my life to stand together, laugh, tell stories, witness each other, and give each other courage. It felt powerful to connect with so many passionate people striving for change.
Monika: Do you believe transgender women can make a real difference in politics and public life?
Robin: I think anyone can make a difference in politics. In fact, I’m surprised you didn’t ask me about when we might see a transgender President! It’s only a matter of time before transgender individuals hold prominent political leadership roles and help shape policy on a broader scale.
Monika: Do you think it’s possible that in our lifetime we’ll see a transgender woman become President of the USA? Or at least the First Lady? :)
Robin: Thank you for that terrific question. In our lifetime? Perhaps. I’m available, ♫born in the USA♫, and am over 35. I think we will certainly reach the point where seeing trans people in public life won’t be considered unusual or surprising. Change often takes time, but progress is definitely happening. We are, as a species, very invested in identity politics. not just trans identity, but also race, sex, and religion. I know our lizard brains are awash in fear-inducing hormones, but we have the opportunity (nee, obligation!) to evolve beyond.
Monika: How do you think society can move past focusing so much on identity labels when judging people?
Robin: When I did stand-up, and a comedian was asked to comment on another comedian’s joke, the highest praise was “funny is funny,” meaning it doesn’t matter if I like it or would have written it. if it gets a laugh, it’s a good joke. I want us to get to the point where we don’t categorize people (Woman President, Black Lawyer, Jewish Baseball Player) but instead look to their character, kindness, and accomplishments. Funny is funny. People are people. That’s the future I hope for.
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| At a party this summer with her friend Doug Sovern (reporter for KCBS Radio) doing our version of Simon and Garfunkel. |
Monika: Are you into fashion? How would you describe your usual style? Do you have any favorite brands, colors, or current trends you like to follow?
Robin: I work in Silicon Valley at the center of high tech, so fashion isn’t a big part of my day. I often joke that I dress like a wealthy toddler. Comfort usually wins over style, especially when deadlines loom.
Monika: Have you ever felt out of place because of how you were dressed?
Robin: I was recently in Washington DC wearing a very nice blouse and skirt and went to a meeting where everyone was in dark suits. I definitely felt underdressed. Then I got on a plane, flew back to California, drove to work the same day, and while waiting at a stoplight by the Apple campus, I saw what looked like a high school science assembly just letting out (my coworkers going to meetings) and felt very overdressed. I’m kind of tall but chunkier than I’d like, so I try to wear clothes that flatter my body and make me feel good about myself. Or I’ll rock a funky t-shirt, MST3K hoodie, jean skirt, and checkerboard Vans. Both styles work fine at Apple, which is pretty great.
Monika: What are your thoughts on transgender beauty pageants? Do they empower the community or reinforce certain stereotypes?
Robin: Same thing I think about all beauty pageants.
Monika: Many transgender women choose to write memoirs. Have you ever considered writing a book about your life or experiences?
Robin: I have. I may. I think the most interesting stories I have to tell are less about my transgender experience and more about simply trying to be me as I stumble through life. Doing a series of autobiographical podcasts is another idea I’ve had. The performer in me will always be looking for an outlet.
Monika: How important is love in your life? Could you share what role it plays for you personally?
Robin: Love is like oxygen. (It was either Voltaire or The Sweet who said that.) It’s all around me, but I tend to take it for granted. Hmmm. I was surprised to see that on my screen, even though I’m the one who typed it. That’s probably worth paying attention to.
Monika: Is there anything new you're exploring or pursuing these days. personally, professionally, or creatively?
Monika: Is there anything new you're exploring or pursuing these days. personally, professionally, or creatively?
Robin: I’m a few days away from my 60th birthday. That feels strange because I don’t feel 60, don’t think I look 60, sure as shit don’t act 60, and I’m not sure how I got here. In many ways, I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. So for new projects, I’d say I’m spending a lot of time learning to play the guitar, looking for a new outlet to scratch my performance itch, and wanting to take everything I’ve learned about people, products, and experience and transform how we think about health, medicine, and technology.
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| Robin's Twitter logo. |
Monika: What message would you give to transgender girls who are grappling with gender dysphoria and self-doubt?
Robin: Write this on a piece of paper, read it when you get up in the morning, read it before you go to bed at night, and keep it with you during the day: You are enough exactly as you are. Right here. Right now. There is nothing wrong with you. No permission is needed. No apologies necessary. All the universe asks is that you try to become the best you, you can be. You get to try anew every day. Anyone who tells you differently can answer to me. If you want to change, do so not because you think it will make you better or happier, but simply because you want to experience change. And if you don’t like what you’ve become, change again. This is your life, and you deserve the freedom to shape it with joy, curiosity, and love.
Monika: How did you come to embrace that level of self-acceptance?
Robin: People are not looking at you, thinking about you, or judging you as much or as often as you think they are. They’ve got their own shit to deal with. It took getting kidney cancer followed by a brain tumor to become enlightened, and here’s what I learned: my friends love me for exactly who I am. Everyone else can go fuck themselves. You don’t need to get cancer to discover this truth. just practice being kind to yourself a little more every day, and the rest will begin to shift.
Monika: My friend Gina Grahame once told me that we shouldn’t limit our potential based on how we were born. or by what we see other transgender people doing. She said our dreams shouldn’t end on the operating table; that’s where they begin. Would you agree?
Robin: Allow me to edit your wise friend, Gina. We should not limit our potential. Our dreams should not end. Enjoy every sandwich.
Monika: Before we wrap up, is there anything else you’d love to add or share with our readers?
Robin: I always wanted the opportunity to answer the 10 Bernard Pivot questions. the ones James Lipton asks on Inside the Actor’s Studio. Since I’m not likely to ever be on his show, maybe I could take a swing here?
Monika: Please do! I’m all ears.
Robin: Thanks… here goes:
1. What is your favorite word?
PIZZA
2. What is your least favorite word?
CAN’T
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually, or emotionally?
SMART/FUNNY/FAST , EVERY NEURON FIRING AT ONCE
4. What turns you off?
PEOPLE WHO SEE LIFE AS A SERIES OF PROBLEMS
5. What is your favorite curse word?
MOTHERFUCKER
6. What sound or noise do you love?
LITTLE KIDS LAUGHING
7. What sound or noise do you hate?
THE SOUND OF ANY ANIMAL IN PAIN
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
PHYSICIAN
9. What profession would you not like to do?
PIMP
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
YOU MADE ME LAUGH!
Monika: Robin, thank you for the interview!
END OF PART 2
All photos: courtesy of Robin Diane Goldstein.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
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