Some women light up a room, Sarah Parlow lights up entire stages, podcasts, and lives. A podcaster and life coach, Sarah uses her voice and heart to help women close the “happiness gap” between where they are and where they dream to be. As a writer, she crafts bold new narratives. As an actress, she brings unforgettable women to life, from Nancy in Off the Menu (2024), Alice Campbell in Patrick (2021), Emma in Starlet Diner (2020), to Lucy in the celebrated Razor Tongue (2019). Sarah Parlow, originally from Pennsylvania, discovered her love for acting during her undergraduate years at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, where she trained with dedicated coaches and immersed herself in theatre and student film projects.
After relocating to Los Angeles in 2016, she fully embraced her artistic path, building a diverse portfolio that spans independent films, television, and stage performances. Her journey reflects not only dedication to the craft, but a fearless pursuit of creativity and growth. Sarah is living proof that beauty, creativity, and intelligence are not separate gifts, they are a powerful trio, and she embodies them effortlessly. Guided by inspirations like Outwitting the Devil by Napoleon Hill, she refuses to “drift” through life. Instead, she creates, leads, inspires, and dares, inviting every woman to believe in her own untapped magic. Whether she’s cycling along California’s golden coast, meditating among swans at the SRF Lake Shrine, or shining on screen, Sarah’s story is a reminder that a woman's true power lies in living vividly, loving fiercely, and dreaming unapologetically.
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| "Connection really is the entire point to me." |
Sarah: Thank you for having me, Monika.
Monika: You wear many fabulous hats: actress, writer, life coach, podcaster, hypnotist. Do you feel more drawn to one role than the others, or are they all just different expressions of the same creative soul?
Sarah: Let’s just say I have a really big hat closet! Haha, seriously though... while I am an artist and a seeker, the one thread connecting all of the hats I wear is the desire to connect.
Connection really is the entire point to me. Whether it’s through an acting performance, a great book, or a great podcast, connection makes us feel more human. I like to provide that spark for other people, too. Life is difficult by design, and our individual journeys can be isolating. I like reminding people that they are not alone.
Monika: You are both a certified life coach and a hypnotist, which is such a fascinating combination. In your experience, does hypnosis add a special dimension to your work as a life coach?
Sarah: Great question. Life coaching is transformative in a conscious way. It’s a great tool for setting goals and achieving them, especially when the coach can pinpoint a client’s blind spots. However, there are still times when we self-sabotage due to limiting beliefs on the subconscious level. That’s where hypnosis really shines. A qualified hypnotist can gently replace a client’s old conditioning with a new set of more aligned and expansive beliefs. The results can be dramatic. Hypnosis takes transformation to a whole other level.
Monika: I’m transgender, and honestly, my life felt like a chaotic screenplay before I transitioned. I’m still on the quest for Mr. Right, I cry during romantic movies, and I get so hung up on being clocked that I sometimes forget to just live. Add a tendency to get emotionally sidetracked from my goals, and… well, would you say I’m a lost cause, or could even someone like me benefit from a life coach?
Sarah: The trans journey is a cosmic experience filled with incredible highs and challenging lows. It requires a lot of heart and a village of support! My approach would be to focus on what you can control: your thoughts and actions. Together, we would work on techniques that reinforce self-acceptance, high self-esteem, and positive self-talk. These elements are more critical than people realize. It may take a little time, but once the inner world changes, the outer expression has no choice but to follow suit. No one is ever a lost cause. Change is always possible with the right tools, Monika.
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| "Rain is an absolute force." |
Sarah: I actually started acting in the early 2000s, but took a long hiatus. Razor Tongue was one of my first opportunities to get back in front of the cameras. It reminded me how I loved to be on set and how acting always feels like coming home.
Rain is an absolute force. The woman has talent and drive for days! We’ve become good friends over the years, and I’ve learned so much from her, like how a true Hollywood visionary operates. Rain helped me write and direct my own project, Lit Girl, back in 2019 and has been an acting coach and mentor to me as well.
Monika: In 2020, you played Emma in Starlet Diner, a modern web-series about three aspiring actresses in Hollywood. Emma, a classy and worldly transgender woman, owns the diner and lives in the heart of the Hollywood scene. What did you enjoy most about bringing Emma to life alongside Angel Qinan and Carolina Gutierrez?
Sarah: Starlet Diner really has a special place in my heart. When Angel approached me about joining the show, she allowed me a lot of creative freedom. The character of Emma was born. Despite being rich and slightly self-involved, I played Emma to be flawed and also have a heart. I feel like complexity only makes a character even more human.
While the show was comedic and somewhat camp, it was a safe environment for all of us to have fun. I think the main draw of the show was the chemistry between the central characters. Angel and Carolina are like sisters to me and Starlet Diner remains one of my most beloved acting experiences to date.
Monika: The three of you, along with your undeniable talent, intelligence, and beauty, embody all the traits that make for a successful Hollywood star. Do you think being transgender is the biggest obstacle for transgender women to become fully-fledged stars in Hollywood, or are there other challenges that stand in the way?
Sarah: There is a lot more opportunity now than there used to be. When I was growing up, you never saw trans women on the cover of a respectable magazine or starring as the lead in a show. We have come a long way. And yes, there is also a very long way to go. I think we need to think in terms of incremental progress versus obstacles at this point. It’s the only way to stay sane.
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| "The trans journey is a cosmic experience filled with incredible highs and challenging lows." |
Monika: So many of us navigate the roles of wives, mothers, and daughters, often carrying the weight of our pasts and sometimes longing to leave it all behind. Yet, you’ve chosen to embrace your identity with such strength, becoming an advocate for transgender rights and vocal about presenting a positive image of our community in society. In the face of all this, have you ever felt the pull of staying in the shadows, of simply being seen as a woman, without the added layers of being a transgender woman?
Sarah: I wasn’t always public about being trans. I transitioned back in 1995, when the world just felt less safe for us, and so I did live ‘stealth’ for probably a good 15-16 years. There was a certain peace in just existing as a woman without the ‘trans’ label. There are also limitations, too. The choice to go public was a difficult one but ultimately, I realized that things would never get better until women like myself began to stand up. Visibility really matters, even if it is a double-edged sword sometimes. I’m proud to be a part of this resilient and beautiful community.
Monika: Choosing a name is such a deeply personal decision, one that can hold layers of significance and meaning. How did you come to choose the name Sarah? Does it carry a special resonance for you, perhaps representing a part of your journey or embodying a particular feeling or aspiration?
Sarah: The backstory to this one is a funny one. I took the name Sarah from my favorite 80’s music band, Bananarama. I thought that Sarah Dallin was their coolest and prettiest member, so I adopted her name when I was 19. I guess I wanted to be cool and pretty too! Plus, I always found ‘Sarah’ to be such a clean and classic name. It means ‘princess’ in Hebrew so I guess that also fits hahaha.
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| "I wasn’t always public about being trans." |
Sarah: One thing I’ll say is that when a person transitions, it never happens in a vacuum. The people around them also transition to some degree, too. When I came out (in 1995), my family felt progressive at the time because they all used my correct name and pronouns. There were always specific family members I could lean on more than others. And that’s ok. Each person is on their own personal journey. I think it’s important to note where your best allies are and lean into people accordingly.
Monika: The journey to being our true selves often comes with a heavy price, losing friends, family, and sometimes even our jobs. What was the hardest part of coming out for you, and how did you navigate it?
Sarah: I can honestly say the answer to that question is shame. Growing up in a very homogenous, Catholic family, I never saw role models of anyone who was different. I really had to craft a life from the inside out. And it was hard to be so painfully different.
Community and connection are important here because shame cannot exist where there is empathy. Learning to unconditionally love and accept ourselves is the most important work trans people will ever do. I get excited about teaching others to do the same.
Monika: Do you remember the first time you saw a trans woman on TV or met one in real life that helped you realize, “That’s me!”?
Sarah: Oh, absolutely. I was probably about six when I saw the James Bond movie “For Your Eyes Only.” Caroline Cossey (Tula) had a small role in the film, and my mother pointed her out, saying she “used to be a boy” and that she’d “had an operation to make her a woman.” I knew immediately I was going to have that operation too one day. That moment was huge for me because I realized that I was not alone. There were other people like me, ones who they felt like I did on the inside. More importantly, there was a pathway I could take to freedom.
Monika: Many of us feel the pressure to “pass” as women, and even after surgeries, society keeps judging us. How do you personally deal with the outside world’s expectations?
Sarah: Whew, this is a tough one. Beauty standards today are already so high, but then get exponentially higher for trans women. Those who don’t pass get constantly harassed. And those who pass too well often get labeled as ‘deceitful.’ It really is a zero-sum game.
First and foremost, I think it’s perfectly reasonable to make changes that help YOU feel more comfortable out in the world. I always recommend that girls start there. Then, it’s best to practice radical self-acceptance for all the things you cannot (or should not) change. In short, all women are going to be judged according to how they look. The key is to present your version of what’s beautiful to the world.
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| "I love to play with different colors and textures." |
Sarah: Thanks for bringing this up, Monika. To be honest, I am pretty disgusted by the environment in the United States right now, enough so that I left the country just before the inauguration. Living overseas for the last five months has helped me find better emotional balance while I plan the next step. What frustrates me the most is that all of this anti-trans discourse is clearly political, manufactured, and dripping with animus.
Trans people in the US contribute to society, pay taxes, and serve in the military just like other groups. All of this is just one big distraction from what’s really happening behind the scenes. I discuss a lot of these issues in my Substack page titled “Beyond the Veil” for any readers who are interested. At this particular inflection point, it’s more important than ever for the entire LGBT community (and allies) to come together.
Monika: How would you describe your personal style? Do you follow any specific fashion trends, or do you have go-to outfits that make you feel confident?
Sarah: When it comes to style, I love to play with different colors and textures. Yellow is one of my signature shades because of how it pops on camera. I tend to gravitate towards styles that are trendy and fitted over styles that are revealing. Showing form is sexy. Showing too much skin usually makes you look cheap.
Monika: Do you love playing around with makeup, or is it more of a “throw on the basics and go” kind of vibe for you?
Sarah: I used to get really creative with eye shadows and different looks when I was younger. Now that I’m close to 50, I prefer a look that is soft, clean, and timeless. Invest in skin care, ladies. A healthy complexion will go a long way.
Monika: By the way, do you like being complimented on your looks? Do you find it easy to accept compliments, or do you struggle with believing them?
Sarah: I don’t think any woman ever gets tired of being complimented. A compliment is essentially someone else saying out loud, “I see you.” And all of us long to be seen. I try to make it a point to compliment people whenever I can. Life is a dance, and it really feels good to tango.
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| "I’d like to write a #1 NYT bestseller." |
Sarah: Like all women, I learned about femininity from my mother and sisters first. The rest was all socialization. I do fall into the more feminine range because that’s what I’m naturally drawn to. I suppose that makes life easier for me because traditional femininity is more digestible to most people. Where I get really off balance is when I channel too much masculine energy, such as in my job as a nurse anesthetist. Navigating the workforce does require us to be much more proactive and assertive. I find too much of that really exhausting these days.
Monika: What was the most surprising part of your transition, something you never expected, whether good or bad?
Sarah: That all the physical stuff was the easy part. I know that’s tough for all the new girls to hear but it’s true!! The real work is staying confident and continuing to shine no matter what the world throws at you. That can feel like walking the razor’s edge some days.
Monika: Many trans women are writing their memoirs these days. Have you ever thought about writing your own book, and if so, what would its central message be?
Sarah: Not quite ready for a memoir because I think all my best chapters are yet to come. So maybe one day. But when I do, I’ll give it a catchy title. Something like “The Red-Headed Shiksa,” for all the Jewish fellas out there!
Monika: Finally, what’s next for Sarah? What dreams and goals are you working toward now?
Sarah: I’d like to write a #1 NYT bestseller. And get married to my soul-mate somewhere in the South of France. I guess I’ll need to meet the soul-mate first!
Monika: Sarah, thank you so much for sharing your journey and insights.
Sarah: Thanks for all you do, Monika.
All the photos: courtesy of Sarah Parlow.
Photo credits: Lisa Garrett, Langgeng Yuwono, Krista Benson, and The Dreamtorium.
© 2025 - Monika Kowalska
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