There are women whose lives shimmer quietly, glimpses of grace in the everyday. And then, there are women like Caroline Cossey, whose very existence reshaped the world’s understanding of beauty, courage, and what it means to live as your whole self. Born in the pastoral calm of Brooke, Norfolk, Caroline entered the world with a secret written in her chromosomes, an intersex variation that gave her a soft, feminine appearance long before doctors could explain it. But in the rigid world of mid-century England, difference was not met with wonder. Caroline’s girlhood was laced with confusion, shame, and bullying, her delicate features marking her as an outsider before she even had the words to defend herself. Yet even in those early years, there were glimpses of the woman she was becoming: the way she and her sister Pam would play dress-up in their mother’s clothes, or how she longed, quietly and achingly, to be seen. To be recognized. To belong, not in disguise, but in truth.
At sixteen, she left school and fled to London, where the city’s electric anonymity gave her a taste of freedom. She took jobs as an usherette, a shop assistant, a showgirl. By seventeen, she had begun hormone therapy. By twenty, she had undergone gender-affirming surgery. And by twenty-one, she was reinventing herself in front of cameras, tall, poised, breathtaking, as the model known as Tula. The world saw the glamour. The magazine spreads in Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar. The dazzling smile on television. The magnetic presence in the 1981 James Bond film For Your Eyes Only. What they didn’t see, until a tabloid brutally outed her, was the private cost of that visibility. In one day, the headlines erased her privacy, twisted her womanhood into scandal, and left her emotionally shattered. But Caroline didn’t break. She rose. She chose, instead, to tell her story on her own terms. Through her memoirs, I Am a Woman and My Story, she gave voice to a truth the world wasn’t ready for, but desperately needed to hear. She showed us that trans women are not shameful secrets, but full and radiant beings, capable of loving, hurting, rising, and remaking the world in our image.
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| Caroline on the cover of Playboy magazine. |
She took her fight to the European Court of Human Rights, demanding recognition not just for herself, but for every trans woman who ever dreamed of living in peace. What Caroline built out of pain is nothing short of sacred. She became a symbol, not of perfection, but of perseverance. Of blooming in harsh climates. Of softness surviving scrutiny. Of a woman claiming her life, inch by inch, stitch by stitch, no matter how many times the world tried to tear it apart. She has been, and continues to be, an inspiration to countless transgender women, including me. Her courage gave me language when I had none. Her defiance gave me hope when mine flickered. And her grace, unshaken through decades of public cruelty, taught me that femininity is not something you inherit. It is something you embody. Today, Caroline lives more quietly, but her legacy hums through every one of us who dares to live visibly and without apology. She is a reminder that behind every headline is a heartbeat, and behind every trans woman’s story is a truth no tabloid can rewrite. It is with deep honor, and even deeper sisterhood, that I now sit down with the extraordinary Caroline Cossey, for a conversation not about her past as a spectacle, but her life as a woman who changed everything.
Monika: Today, it is both my pleasure and a true honor to welcome Caroline Cossey, also known as Tula, a trailblazing British model and actress, unforgettable Bond girl, tireless transgender rights activist, and one of the most inspiring trans women in the history of our movement. Ranked #24 on FHM’s 100 Sexiest Women list in 1995, Caroline is also the author of two powerful autobiographies that have touched countless lives. Hello, Caroline!
Caroline: Hello, Monika! Thank you so much for that beautiful introduction. I'm truly touched. And may I just say, the honor is all mine. You’re such a remarkable woman, Monika. The work you're doing, amplifying trans voices, offering guidance, and helping fellow transgender women find strength in their own stories, is incredibly meaningful. Let’s dive in!
Monika: You’ve long been one of the most charismatic and influential role models for transgender women, including myself. I often wonder, are you fully aware of just how many lives you’ve touched and saved, not only in the UK but around the world, simply by living your truth with such grace and courage?
Caroline: It gives me great comfort to know that something good came out of all the pain and suffering I endured after being outed, especially in terms of raising international awareness and helping other trans people find their self-worth, direction, and life’s purpose. I’ve had the repeated privilege over the years of people writing to me or telling me that I saved their life. It would have all been worth it to save a single life, so I’ve been very blessed in that regard. Knowing this continues to give me strength and reminds me why visibility still matters so deeply.
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| Modeling photo |
Monika: While preparing for our conversation and reading through various articles about your life, I was struck by just how much strength and resilience you’ve shown over the years. One of your first great tests came when, as a young girl growing up in Norfolk, you faced cruel bullying and ridicule, and somehow, you found the strength to keep going, to rise above it all. How did you survive those early years?
Caroline: Being bullied and ridiculed at such a young age is crippling, and without such a close and loving family, I have no doubt I would’ve taken my own life. It knocks all your self-worth out of you and turns you inward from the world. I became extremely introverted.
To this day, I still have triggers that are very upsetting, and I suppose I will for as long as I live. I think it’s important to remember we all have this strength inside us. We endure scars, but they tell the story of our triumphs, not just the story of our travails. And every time I share my journey, I hope it offers someone else a little more courage to keep going too.
Monika: After transitioning at the age of 20, you launched a dazzling modeling career that many young women could only dream of. What was it like to see your stunning face gracing advertisements and magazine covers all over the world? Did it feel like a kind of affirmation, both personal and professional?
Caroline: As trans women, we all have insecurities. The modeling industry is a purely visual industry, and a highly competitive one at that, so being able to achieve the success that I did was tremendously reassuring and gratifying. I worked across the entire spectrum as a model, in nude pinup, calendar, fashion, swimwear, hair, and beauty ads. That in itself was even more gratifying because I wasn’t hiding anything under clothes. It was the biggest compliment to be paid to have pictures taken of me. And for someone who once felt invisible and ashamed, it became an act of healing every time a camera celebrated me.
Monika: When you became a Page Three Girl for The Sun and later a Playboy pin-up, did those moments feel like milestones in your journey toward acceptance and womanhood? Did they give you a sense of power or validation in a world that often tried to deny you both?
Caroline: Yes, absolutely. To understand that, I think it’s important to consider the context of the times. I had no trans role models, and there was so much hostility directed toward, and ignorance regarding, trans people. So to be embraced in such a public and traditionally feminine space gave me a powerful sense of affirmation I had never experienced before.
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| Girl power. |
There was extraordinary pressure to feel accepted and to pass, both for my self-worth and for my safety on a daily basis. Would I feel the same way today? I hope not. We've come such a long way, but as long as society insists on drawing rigid lines around sex and gender, the harmful notion of 'passing' will continue to exist. It's madness, really, because there are plenty of cisgender men and women who wouldn't 'pass' under those same arbitrary standards.
Monika: Your modeling success opened the door to film and television, culminating in your appearance as a Bond girl in For Your Eyes Only (1981), an iconic moment in pop culture history. What was it like to be part of such a legendary franchise? Did you enjoy the experience?
Caroline: Walking along the side of a pool is not what I call acting, but I was very proud to be cast as a Bond girl. At that point in my career, I had done, or was also doing, lots of little cameo appearances on different TV shows, as well as commercials and what could have been a ten-year run as a staple on the game show 3-2-1. Ironically, it was that success that gave the relentless journalist more funding for my outing. It was bittersweet in retrospect, but in that moment, I truly felt like I had arrived.
Monika: We’ve touched on some deeply meaningful topics so far, so let’s lighten the mood a bit. Of all the actors who’ve portrayed James Bond, Sean Connery, George Lazenby, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig, which one made your heart skip a beat? Who, in your opinion, was the most irresistible 007?
Caroline: Sean Connery, for me, was the sexiest and the best Bond with all that he brought to the screen. He had that effortless charm and raw masculinity that made him unforgettable.
Monika: Being cast as a Bond girl propelled you into the global spotlight, but that visibility came at a steep price. When The News of the World outed you as transgender, your career came crashing down overnight. How did you cope with the tidal wave of transphobia and betrayal that followed?
Caroline: It absolutely crushed me. I was desperate and suicidal. Only with my family’s and close friends’ support was I able to get up and fight. They had portrayed me as a con, but I was the victim, and this should never have happened. Had my paperwork been in order and if I had had the legal support back then, it wouldn’t have happened, so I set out to change the law and took the British government on. The injustice I endured became the driving force behind my determination to fight for the rights of all trans people.
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| On the modeling catwalk. |
Monika: The cruelty of the tabloids was not new even then. If I’m not mistaken, April Ashley also had her modeling and acting career destroyed by a similar outing in the 1960s. Did you ever feel a connection with what she went through?
Caroline: Actually, it was The Sunday People that outed April Ashley, but a tabloid all the same. The checkbook journalism back in our day has a lot to answer for! Thank God privacy laws are so much better today. April’s story was heartbreaking, and in many ways, it foreshadowed what would happen to me, we were both sacrificed for headlines.
Monika: Looking back, you possessed the intelligence, talent, and timeless beauty (which you still have!) to become a major Hollywood actress or a household name in high fashion. Do you ever feel a sense of regret? Do you think you could have gone even further if the world had been more accepting?
Caroline: I think we all have our destinies, and mine played out how it was meant to. There are days I feel like I was born forty years too soon, but I also managed to achieve a lot considering the hostility, restrictions, and lack of opportunities of those times, and I was able to invoke change. I’ve been lucky. And knowing that my journey helped pave the way for others gives me a sense of purpose that fame alone never could.
Monika: In recent years, we’ve seen a growing presence of transgender characters in film and television, and more coverage of trans stories in the media and literature. How do you feel about this increased visibility and representation?
Caroline: I am absolutely delighted because the awareness and visibility help turn the wheels of acceptance and continue to nourish an improving support system. It’s heartening to witness a world where younger generations can see themselves reflected with dignity and pride in the stories around them.
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| Glamour shot. |
Caroline: I had a willing partner to marry and it was a long and grueling journey I embarked on. I had to exhaust all domestic remedies before being able to take my case to Strasbourg. I was taking the British government to court on two counts: the right to amend my birth certificate and the right to marry. The process was emotionally draining, but I knew I wasn’t just fighting for myself, I was fighting for every trans person denied their dignity and rights.
Monika: In 1989, when the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg ruled in your favor, it must have felt like the tide was finally turning. You married businessman Elias Fattal, and for a moment, it seemed happiness was finally within reach. But then came yet another cruel twist, once again, you were outed by the press, and your husband chose to leave you. How did you cope with such a painful betrayal during what should have been a joyful time?
Caroline: I won on both counts at Strasbourg, but the British government appealed the decision and won on the appeal. I had met Elias Fattal, and we married. On the day that we returned from our honeymoon, it was the front page of News of the World that I had married multimillionaire Elias Fattal. We had decided not to tell his family about me being transsexual because they had such a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I was Christian. We wanted to wait until they got to know me first and planned on telling them when we had to deal with surrogacy. He was summoned home and his brother William took over, and I was given my marching orders. The marriage was annulled. Rejection at such a happy time in my life cut me deeply. It would have been easier to deal with if he had died. I kept going, but a part of me was shattered in a way that took years to heal.
END OF PART 1
Main photo credits: Sofia Sanchez Mauro Mongiello Source: Facebook.
© 2017 - Monika Kowalska
