Heli Hämäläinen is a Finnish transgender woman whose determination to live according to her gender identity brought her into a landmark legal battle over marriage, human rights and legal gender recognition. Born in 1963, she graduated from the Helsinki School of Economics in 1991 and built a career in public service. She married her wife in 1996, and their daughter was born in 2002. In 2004, Heli reached a point when she could no longer suppress her female identity and sought professional help. She was diagnosed as transsexual in April 2006 and subsequently began living as a woman. She changed her first names in June 2006 and underwent gender-affirming surgery in September 2009. Throughout this process, she was determined to preserve her marriage and maintain the family life she and her wife had built together. However, Finnish law presented her with a painful dilemma. Because same-sex marriage was not legally recognised in Finland, the authorities refused to grant her legal recognition as a woman while she remained married to her wife. The available options required the couple either to divorce or to convert their marriage into a registered partnership, a change that conflicted with their religious convictions and their understanding of marriage.
Heli challenged this requirement through the Finnish courts and ultimately took her case to the European Court of Human Rights. On July 16, 2014, the Court's Grand Chamber ruled that Finland had not violated the European Convention on Human Rights. The decision attracted international criticism from transgender rights and human rights organisations, which argued that people should not have to choose between recognition of their gender identity and the continuation of their marriage. Despite the ruling, Heli remained determined to continue her life with her wife. Her case brought international attention to the difficulties faced by transgender people whose legal identity does not reflect their lived reality. As a public servant, a wife, a mother and a practising Christian, she offered a perspective that challenged assumptions about transgender identity, family and faith. In our interview we discuss her transition, her family, her professional life, her religious beliefs and the legal struggle to have her gender recognised while remaining married. Her story is a powerful reminder that the fight for dignity and equality is not simply about legal documents. It is also about the freedom to live authentically without being forced to sacrifice the people and commitments one holds most dear.
Monika: Heli, welcome! It is a pleasure to have you with us today.
Heli: Hello Monika, it is my pleasure to meet you.
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| Helsinki Pride 2008. |
Monika: Please tell me a little about yourself.
Heli: I am soon 51 years old. I have worked most of my career as a public servant. I graduated in 1991 from the Helsinki School of Economics, which is nowadays part of Aalto University. I got married in 1996 in Keuruu Church, which was built in 1892. I am Evangelical Lutheran. My daughter was born in 2002.
Monika: When did you realize that your female identity could no longer stay hidden?
Heli: In the autumn of 2004, I felt that I could no longer suppress my female identity. My life was awful because even the advertisements at bus stops reminded me of my gender. I couldn’t read women’s magazines.
Monika: How did your wife react, and what steps did you take after that?
Heli: My wife gave me the advice to seek professional help, and I did. A referral was written to official transsexuality investigations in November 2004, and I met the psychiatrist in February 2005. I was diagnosed as transsexual in April 2006, and I changed my forename in June 2006. In July 2007, I had the mandatory letter of infertility and two letters for genital surgery as well as for gender recognition. I could not have my gender recognized because of my religious marriage.
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| Church Council candidate in 2010. |
Heli: Yes, I did. I thought that this was a violation of Article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights, the right to respect for private and family life.
Monika: After the Finnish courts, you took your complaint to the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR). What did the Court decide?
Heli: In the Fourth Section, no violation. In the Grand Chamber, no violation, but with a dissenting opinion.
Monika: Appeals like these surely demanded professional legal advice. Did Finnish transgender organizations help you with that?
Heli: I got support for the Grand Chamber. It was a pro bono agreement, so I got a lawyer for free but paid my own expenses in Strasbourg, France.
Monika: Without legal confirmation of your female gender, what does everyday life look like for you?
Heli: At the moment I use my car to commute to work. But when I had a travel card, I had problems with ticket inspectors who wanted to confiscate it. As a resident of the City of Helsinki, I am entitled to discount prices, but I have to have my personal identity number encoded in the chip. As there is no name or other identification, that card has information that it belongs to a male person born in 1963. There are also other inconveniences, such as a passport with a male marker. That is a risk while travelling abroad. I have not travelled in ten years as a customs officer.
Monika: Turning to society at large, how would you describe the present situation of transgender women in Finland?
Heli: I quote the webpage of the Ombudsman for Equality: “The Finnish Equality Act and the Finnish Non-Discrimination Act currently include no anti-discrimination provisions regarding gender minorities.”
Monika: Did the Finnish Parliament say anything on the matter?
Heli: In its report issued in connection with amending the Finnish Equality Act in 2005, the Employment and Equality Committee of the Finnish Parliament stated that according to a decision of the European Court of Justice, discrimination on the basis of sex or gender covers discrimination on the basis of gender reassignment as well as discrimination on the basis of a person being male or female. Other ways of protecting gender minorities from discrimination were left open. The Employment and Equality Committee of the Finnish Parliament nevertheless stated that reinforcing the protection of gender minorities from discrimination and determining whether the issue should be covered by the Finnish Equality Act or the Finnish Non-Discrimination Act are amongst future priorities.
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| The day she was diagnosed. |
Heli: The anti-discrimination provisions of the Constitution of Finland also cover cases where persons are being discriminated against because they belong to a gender minority. The guidelines of the Finnish Ombudsman for Equality are based on the premise that at least until the anti-discrimination protection of gender minorities is clearly established by law, the Finnish Equality Act should be interpreted so as to also apply more broadly to gender minorities and not just to persons who have undergone gender reassignment surgery. The Finnish Ombudsman for Equality has stated that the Finnish Equality Act should be amended as soon as possible to also cover gender minorities.
Monika: Tell me about your own transition. How old were you, and was it a difficult process?
Heli: I was 41 in 2005 and 45 in 2009 when I had my bottom surgery.
Monika: Did you follow any transgender role models at that time?
Heli: I read Jenny Boylan’s “She’s Not There.” It was quite inspiring in the middle of a marriage crisis. For me personally, it was very important to keep my family together in transition. I have made compromises too. The marriage is one that is important to both of us, but also it seemed clear that my daughter needed a father who is a father socially as well.
Monika: You spoke of compromises made for the sake of your family. What did that look like for your daughter?
Heli: So I decided to take part in all Father’s Day events in daycare. We have Father’s Day in Finland on the second Sunday of November. It is important for my daughter that we have a Father’s Day lunch and she can bake me a cake. At school, she prepares Father’s Day gifts, and she was bullied because she does not have a father. I told her and the boy who bullied her that she definitely has a father who is alive and kicking!
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| Heli’s family seen by her daughter. |
Monika: Looking back, which part of coming out was the hardest?
Heli: Telling my wife, definitely. At work, it was an issue but a medical one.
Monika: Finnish films, newspapers and books have featured transgender stories and characters. What is your impression of them so far?
Heli: I do not see anything extraordinary there. Should I?
Monika: Has any recent Finnish book, film or event about transgender topics caught your attention?
Heli: As this shit is behind me, I do not pick especially a book or a program about transgender persons. But I do not have anything against transgender persons.
Monika: The transgender cause is usually presented alongside the other LGBT communities. As the last letter in the abbreviation, can the transgender community promote its own agenda within the group?
Heli: I support full independence. This is a matter of gender identity, not a matter of sexual orientation. But unfortunately, the European Court of Human Rights did not see this difference. We are the last cabin of a homosexual train. We get our load of shit because we are transgender but also get restrictions because we are mixed with sexual orientation minorities.
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| Transgender revolutionary. |
Monika: Some believe that joining forces with the LGB movement was a strategic mistake, while others disagree. Where do you stand in that debate?
Heli: Debates have raged over whether we should hitch up to the LGBs or not. The main reason at that time was we were so small, closeted, and unknown that we needed the critical mass of the established movement to get any hearing. Some believe that was a huge strategic mistake, others do not. However, the fact that our personal issues are often quite dissimilar makes common ground difficult as long as we focus on those differences rather than the basic human rights aspects. Pointing out our differences will only lead to divisions. However, we are not the same, and we do not have the same needs.
Monika: Can you give an example of how being treated as one mass affects you in Finland?
Heli: For sure I understand that concept of “critical mass,” but it has the side effect of being treated as mass. For example, here in Finland where I live, the legislator has taken as a prerequisite for gender recognition that you are not married. And if you are, your spouse should consent with you to convert your holy marriage between a man and a woman into a civil partnership. Why? Because first we are taken as homosexuals, and we are a subtype of homosexuals that has gender issues.
Monika: In the USA of the 1960s and 70s, Harvey Milk became a symbol of gay activism. Does the Finnish transgender community have anyone whose actions could be compared to his?
Heli: Yes, we have our gay activist history. Our former president Tarja Halonen was chair of Seta, the sexual equality organization in Finland, in 1980-1981.
Monika: Politics is another way to change things. Are you active in it or involved in any lobbying campaigns, and can transgender women truly make a difference there?
Heli: I tried my wings in municipal elections, but I have given up that idea. Partly it is because I found that, in spite of having more votes than a male candidate, I could not have a confidential post. It was a crisis in the party that I still had my male identity number. We have quotas for men and women in city council confidential posts. I thought this was the last time. I am not satisfied with the stance towards equal marriage in that party, so I have resigned.
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| At 50 years. |
Monika: What role does love play in your life?
Heli: It is very important to me.
Monika: Many transgender women tell their stories in memoirs. Has the idea of writing a book of your own ever crossed your mind?
Heli: I think it would be labelled as “social porn.” So many transgender ladies have written their memoirs with the same manuscript. I have nothing to add to the public.
Monika: What are you working on at the moment?
Heli: My garden project in Keuruu. Last summer I planted 22 berry bushes, though the summer was awfully hot. But I need to sweat because I have a creeping second type of diabetes and I need to lose weight. I did not go to Strasbourg, France, for the hearing of the judgement because I had my garden project. Next summer I will expand my garden further to the waterfront of our second home in Keuruu.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria?
Heli: Seek professional help. Have your gender dysphoria treated. But remember to put first things first. Sometimes the straightforward, oversimplified strategy does not bring as good results as communicating with your beloved ones. You may have to give up the official part of the transition, the gender recognition, but you may win back your life. And remember that each transition is unique as each individual is unique. And God loves all of us. Even those who do not know Him. Because God is love.
Monika: Heli, thank you so much for this conversation!
Heli: Thank you, Monika!
All the photos: courtesy of Heli Hämäläinen.
© 2014 - Monika Kowalska
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