Simone Whitlow is a New Zealand–based singer, guitarist, and transgender activist whose life and work beautifully intertwine music, authenticity, and courage. Best known as a former member of the progressive hard rock band Ishtar, Simone helped shape the group’s sound during the 2000s, drawing inspiration from classic stadium rock icons such as Led Zeppelin, Queen, Black Sabbath, and Van Halen, while also weaving in influences from Muse, Rush, and Dream Theater. For Simone, music has always been about painting scenes with sound, exploring rich harmonies, narrative depth, and an ever-evolving palette that ranges from heavy rock to folk, roots, and 1960s-inspired songwriting. Her artistic path, however, has never existed in isolation from her personal journey. Simone approaches creativity with a deep sense of honesty, shaped by growth, self-reflection, and lived experience. Transitioning allowed her to move from writing behind characters to writing more openly from herself, bringing a new emotional clarity to her work.
She speaks candidly about the challenges she faced, from workplace discrimination to the fear of losing relationships, while also emphasizing the profound relief and joy of finally living authentically. Supported by family and strengthened by resilience, she describes transition not as an end point but as a process of becoming fully present in her own life. This openness gives her voice, both musical and personal, a rare sense of sincerity and depth. Beyond her musical journey, Simone speaks openly and thoughtfully about her transition, her experiences as a transgender woman in New Zealand, and the importance of visibility, healthcare access, and human rights for trans communities. Passionate, creative, intellectually curious, and firmly committed to living her truth, Simone Whitlow is a compelling voice whose story reflects both personal resilience and a broader cultural journey toward understanding and acceptance.
Monika: Today, it is both a pleasure and an honor to welcome Simone Whitlow, a singer, guitar player, transgender activist, and former member of the New Zealand hard rock group Ishtar. Simone, it’s wonderful to have you here.
Simone: Heya Monika, lovely to meet you.
Monika: To start us off, how would you introduce yourself to someone who is meeting you for the first time?
Simone: Hmm, let’s see, I work a day job, I don’t like to define myself. Music runs through my veins, though I don’t have the time at present to do much with it. I am passionate, creative, and intellectual, and in fledgling steps towards entrepreneurship at the moment. I’m very happily post-transition and in the process of achieving my ideal life, unencumbered, however, I have more pieces to the jigsaw than space to lay it down right now.
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| Courtesy of Simone Whitlow. |
Monika: Your music feels rooted in many traditions at once.
Simone: Sure. My musical baby throughout the 2000s was a progressive hard rock band called Ishtar. We released a couple of EPs in the mid-2000s and fell apart just when we were starting to make some real headway. We rebooted the band in 2010, but it just wasn’t the right time for it and was wrought with all kinds of band politics. Inspiration-wise for me, Ishtar was meant in the vein of Led Zeppelin, Queen, Black Sabbath, Van Halen, all those classic stadium bands, with a touch of Muse, Rush, and Dream Theater.
Monika: Beyond those big rock influences, what were you trying to express emotionally or sonically?
Simone: Though for me, music has always been primarily about painting scenes with sound. The last version of the band, I was trying to find a way of bringing in a more folky, roots music influence and a bit more of a 60s thing, writing for the jukebox like Phil Spector’s bands and Motown did, I guess, just more colors on the palate, I guess. I also was doing a lot of co-vocalist stuff, lots of close harmonies kept up high in the mix. Inspirations beyond the band? Hmm, it’s a pretty long list.
Monika: Where does music fit into your life right now? Are there any new artistic projects on the horizon?
Simone: Nothing at the moment. I hope to soon, but I do have a lot on my plate at the moment with a day job, a sideline selling electric guitars online, hopes to study via correspondence in 2015, and, umm, a few kgs of post-op weight to shake.
Monika: Even if it’s on pause, is there a creative vision waiting in the wings?
Simone: I have a new project mind-mapped out, I would love to develop and launch it when I can free up the time. I do have around 20 unfinished songs I would love to come back to and release in the near future, should I be able to fit it all in.
Monika: Looking back, did your transition influence how you experience creativity and express yourself as an artist?
Simone: I would have to say yes, I think, though God only knows what is down to transition and what is down to growing as a human being in general. Pre-transition, I wrote mostly third-person narrative, or when writing in the first person, it was in character; I found in transition I really was writing more like ‘myself’.
I think there was more of a sense of ‘honesty’ too in what I was willing to bring to the table. For one, we did a heavied-up cover of The Exciters’ ‘Tell Him’, because I thought it was a cool song. I don’t think pre-transition we would have done it.
Monika: We’re seeing increasing visibility of transgender women in music today. Do you feel this is the beginning of a broader movement?
Simone: OMG, I hope so! I think a lot of us trans girls are artistic, articulate, talented folk whose voices should be heard. Of course, the more of us out there, the more we become understood, which is a win for all.
Simone: I have a new project mind-mapped out, I would love to develop and launch it when I can free up the time. I do have around 20 unfinished songs I would love to come back to and release in the near future, should I be able to fit it all in.
Monika: Looking back, did your transition influence how you experience creativity and express yourself as an artist?
Simone: I would have to say yes, I think, though God only knows what is down to transition and what is down to growing as a human being in general. Pre-transition, I wrote mostly third-person narrative, or when writing in the first person, it was in character; I found in transition I really was writing more like ‘myself’.
I think there was more of a sense of ‘honesty’ too in what I was willing to bring to the table. For one, we did a heavied-up cover of The Exciters’ ‘Tell Him’, because I thought it was a cool song. I don’t think pre-transition we would have done it.
Monika: We’re seeing increasing visibility of transgender women in music today. Do you feel this is the beginning of a broader movement?
Simone: OMG, I hope so! I think a lot of us trans girls are artistic, articulate, talented folk whose voices should be heard. Of course, the more of us out there, the more we become understood, which is a win for all.
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| Interview for GayTalk Tonight (YouTube). |
Monika: When you look at the broader music scene, do you sense a similar wave of transgender artists emerging in New Zealand?
Simone: Unless the girls are all stealth, not that I’m aware of. I don’t believe I’m the only one, though. I would love to see more trans musicians in NZ; from my experience, they would be made to feel very welcome by most.
Monika: Beyond music, how would you describe the current reality for transgender women in New Zealand society?
Simone: I think it’s a lot better than the various societies and support groups of New Zealand would give it credit for sometimes. New Zealand has a reputation for being welcoming and open-minded with good reason, IMO. Not to say there aren’t battles to be fought, in terms of medical access and a number of points of law to specifically safeguard against discrimination, etc., but my experience of New Zealand is that it is a very accepting place for trans folk.
Monika: Turning to your own journey, when did you begin your transition, and what stands out when you look back on that period?
Simone: Truthfully, I started quite late, at 31, after a few stumbling attempts earlier. There were some problems along the way; I did lose a few friends and, for some time, shut myself away from several other friends while cocooned away. I had trouble with one particular mid-level manager at a former job, who, in retrospect, I should have taken to court for discrimination, though I was worried it would void good work references from other managers there.
Monika: How did your family respond as your transition unfolded?
Simone: My relationship with my parents is better now than it ever has been (they both even went over to Thailand with me for my GRS, to look after me), but, you know, as much as you’re on a journey, so is everyone you love, and transition can be a rough journey for family sometimes.
Monika: With the benefit of hindsight, how do you feel about the choices you made and the person you became?
Simone: Overall, I’d have to say anyone I cared for and who cared about me is still on my side; those who mind really don’t matter, and those who matter ultimately don’t mind… and to finally be your true, authentic self, the odd bit of discomfort is a small price to pay.
Monika: During that time, were there any transgender figures or stories that helped guide or reassure you?
Simone: I guess no one that I was modeling myself after, as absolutely terrible as that sounds. I used to love going through Lynn Conway’s TS Women’s successes pages, though; it gives you a lot of confidence to know there are so many of us out there thriving in all aspects of life.
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| Courtesy of Simone Whitlow. |
Monika: Looking at the community today, are there any transgender women whose work or presence you particularly admire?
Simone: Totally! I have huge respect for anyone transgender in music or the arts, especially Marissa Martinez and Jordana LeSesne, whom I have chatted with online a couple of times and do follow online. Laverne Cox is absolutely incredible, both as a spokesperson and in her role on Orange Is the New Black.
Monika: Are there others, perhaps writers or local figures, who have inspired you in a different way?
Simone: I greatly admire Janet Mock. On a local level, Racheal McGonigal, Roxanne Henare, and Jacquie Grant are three ladies I greatly admire, respect, and look up to.
Monika: Coming out is often described as a process rather than a single moment. What was the most difficult part for you?
Simone: In retrospect, the prequel; far too many years living an absolutely miserable existence. I have said to people before that I felt like a non-person until I began transitioning, and that is something I could never go back to. You do fear losing everything though, your friends and family, your job, you name it; I was no different to a lot of people in that respect, I guess.
Monika: Looking beyond individual stories, do you see transgender rights as the next major frontier in human rights?
Simone: I believe so. In NZ, before my time, a lot of the essential human rights stuff was already fought for, but there are still wars to be won. For me, it is all about providing health care earlier and providing GRS for those for whom it is right, free of charge.
Monika: How do you explain this urgency to people who see transition-related care as non-essential?
Simone: In the past, I have commented that you don’t leave kids with cleft palates or other deformities that preclude them from living an ordinary life, and over a lifespan, the Government subsidies on higher doses of hormones and androgen blockers than needed post-op accrue to much more than the one-off cost of GRS, so economically it makes sense, IMO. In terms of some of the stuff I see in my newsfeed from conservative American states, and around Transgender Day of Remembrance, etc., there is a much bigger frontier than NZ that needs navigating.
Monika: How do you feel about the way transgender lives and characters have been portrayed in films, books, and the media so far?
Simone: OMG, how we are depicted has come a very long way, in the most positive of ways, IMO…. My early memories of transgender people in the media, everything was in a Jerry Springer kind of vein. If anything, I think we need more trans actors portraying trans roles, IMO.
Monika: The transgender cause is often grouped within the broader LGBT movement. Do you feel the trans community can still effectively advocate for its own specific needs?
Simone: When needed, I believe yes; however, I think the various factions under the ‘umbrella’ will always disagree over too much to get along and be friends.
Monika: When you think about transgender activism in New Zealand, are there figures whose impact reminds you of what Harvey Milk represented in the US during the 60s and 70s?
Simone: A name often mentioned in New Zealand is Carmen Rupe, though she was one of several of that generation who made huge leaps and bounds for trans society in New Zealand.
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| Courtesy of Simone Whitlow. |
Monika: Are there others whose influence you feel deserves special recognition?
Simone: Jacquie Grant, IMO, did a LOT for trans people, and for a lot of people in general in New Zealand. Of course, Georgina Beyer put New Zealand on the map in some ways, former mayor and MP and all.
Monika: How personally engaged are you with politics today? And more broadly, do you believe transgender women can truly influence political change?
Simone: I have spoken with the media on a few occasions about how ridiculous our super-long waiting list for GRS is, though it is hard to get across to many New Zealanders you’re not asking for some frivolous plastic surgery, something that literally saves lives sometimes and allows people often in limbo to get out there and thrive. Absolutely, I think we can make a difference in politics, as much as any other sector in society anyway.
Monika: Let’s shift to something lighter. How would you describe your personal style? Are there any colors, materials, or trends you’re especially drawn to?
Simone: I do, and I do try to regularly update my look, though more from a perspective of regularly hitting the mall, as opposed to fanatically following fashionistas and what have you. This year has mostly been about prints, earth tones, and a lot of sheer fabric, I guess, oh, and maxi dresses for casual wear. I am mad about jewelry, blue stones especially (Sapphires, Topaz, Amethyst, Lapis Lazuli… Tanzanite have to be the most incredible stones ever to come out of the ground), and in spite of being 6.0” in bare feet, I do love a good 2½-inch high heel.
Monika: On a more personal note, what place does love hold in your life right now?
Simone: Currently, I am single and would love to have a man in my life. Just another piece in the jigsaw puzzle I’ve yet to locate, I guess.
Monika: Many transgender women choose to tell their stories through memoirs. Have you ever considered writing one yourself, or telling your story in another creative way?
Simone: Hmm, I don’t know so much about a book, though there was a time when I was flatting with a group of very interesting people where we had a running joke our flat would make for a great sitcom.
Monika: What made that idea stick with you?
Simone: A few years ago, one of the flatmates, an actor who was quite famous over here in his 20s, started working on developing something, but it really didn’t reflect the reality of the flat terribly much. For one, he was in talks with pro wrestler The Ultimate Warrior to be part of the show, as a kind of online, Skyping version of Home Improvement’s Wilson, and apparently was open to the concept, but… well, God knows, it never got past concept, hehe… I think I’d love to work on that, Ultimate Warrior imparting wisdom or not.
Monika: Finally, drawing on everything you’ve lived and learned, what would you say to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria right now?
Simone: OMG, that is a loooonng interview in itself! I guess, to quote William Shakespeare: “This above all: to thine own self be true.” Umm, maintain your friendships and networks, be true to yourself, but also be aware when you need to be careful.
Monika: What practical steps helped you stay grounded during that process?
Simone: Create a transition plan. Take transition photos so you can look back at how far you’ve come. Maintain a sense of perspective in all ways. Don’t expect just because people love you that they will get it immediately; they now have a journey to go on too. Keep in mind you are in the process of embarking upon becoming the true, authentic you, so strive to be the best you you can be in every way you can.
Monika: Simone, thank you for the interview!
All the photos:courtesy of Simone Whitlow.
© 2015 - Monika Kowalska
