Sophia Gubb is a British-born writer who now lives in Germany and whose life and work move thoughtfully between personal reflection, creativity, and social awareness. She is the author of the autobiographical book Stubborn Soul published in 2015, a deeply honest account shaped by memory, vulnerability, and the need to tell a story before it fades. Through writing and public speaking, Sophia explores themes of gender transition, identity, spirituality, personal development, animal rights, and LGBT issues, always with a strong sense of humanity and self-awareness. Her writing emerged not from a calculated plan, but from a repeated and deeply personal process of telling her story as a way to release shame and connect with others. Over time, these retellings formed a narrative that felt necessary to preserve and share.
Currently based in Berlin, Sophia is navigating life after the most intense period of her gender transition, focusing on recovery, self-care, and rebuilding stability. She speaks candidly about the emotional cost of transition, including the loss of friendships and the feeling of abandonment that can follow coming out. At the same time, she emphasizes the importance of remembering that life does not end with transition, and that it is still possible to live fully, creatively, and even joyfully. Her perspective is shaped by lived experience across several countries, including Britain, Spain, and Germany, each of which has influenced her understanding of transgender communities and social attitudes. Sophia is also outspoken about the limitations of transgender representation in media, advocating for stories where being trans is not the sole defining trait of a character. In this interview, she reflects on love, politics, creativity, and resilience, offering a voice that is thoughtful, grounded, and quietly hopeful.
Monika: Today it is both a pleasure and an honor to welcome Sophia Gubb, a British-born writer now living in Germany and the author of the autobiographical book Stubborn Soul published in 2015. Hello, Sophia.
Sophia: Hi Monika!
Monika: Sophia, to begin, how would you describe yourself to readers who may be discovering your work and your story for the first time?
Sophia: Um, I have lots of identities, but I'm not sure what to say that really speaks about who I am. I'm a writer, a speaker when I can manage it, and I am very passionate about trying to help the world however I can. I'm into spirituality, personal development, animal rights, including vegetarianism and veganism, and LGBT topics. That said, right now I'm recovering from the most intense part of my gender transition and trying to find some kind of stability in my life, so I'm not working at full capacity.
Monika: What initially motivated you to write your autobiography, and why did it feel like the right project to focus on at that moment in your life?
Sophia: Well, I had an opportunity for a year to have my living expenses supported while I wrote a book. There were lots of things I wanted, and still want, to write about, but this project made sense as the first one simply for the pragmatic reason that the longer I wait, the more of my memories I will forget. It felt important to capture those memories while they were still vivid and emotionally accessible to me.
Monika: Beyond the practical reasons, what did repeatedly telling your life story give you on a more personal and emotional level?
Sophia: Aside from that, well, I've told my life story at least four times, on an internet forum, on my website, in an email to two friends of mine, and finally out loud to an audience of around forty people. Each time, it was a way of processing, releasing my shame about the darker events, and connecting with people. I ended up writing the book simply because it was a story I had, and I thought it needed to be told. Of course, I have ideas about how it could be helpful in different ways too, but my original plan was not so specific as that. Sharing it publicly helped me feel less alone with experiences I had carried quietly for a long time.
Monika: Looking back on your journey, which parts of your experience do you feel might be most meaningful or encouraging for other trans women?
Sophia: I guess I'd like to be a role model for someone who can do cool stuff, like my writing and talks, that aren't directly related to being trans. Being plunged into transition, I felt disoriented and like life would never be the same again. It's nice to remember that we are still people, and we can live a normal life or a pleasantly abnormal life, and oftentimes forget completely that we just so happened to have a little genital mix-up that we had to respond to at one point.
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| More about the book - here. |
Monika: When did you begin your gender transition, and who, if anyone, stood by you during those early and often overwhelming stages?
Sophia: I started at 22. My girlfriend at the time was a big support, listening to my obsessing about the topic quite patiently and giving me the basic recognition I needed at that point. We later broke up, and I moved to Berlin and found a new partner, who was genderqueer and one of the first people to really understand me on this level. My family was not a big influence on my transition, though.
Monika: During that period, did you have any transgender figures or role models who helped guide or inspire you as you navigated this new reality?
Sophia: Not really. I was pretty much clueless when I started. I had almost no information at all and basically threw myself into living as a woman with minimal preparation. It took me quite a while to build up a transgender community around myself.
Monika: Looking back now, what was the most painful or difficult part of coming out for you on a personal level?
Sophia: Losing friends. I lost my old best friend from high school, plus several others who either outright rejected me or just became more distant. I had this horrible feeling of abandonment.
Monika: Based on your perspective, how do you view the current situation and social climate for transgender women in the United Kingdom?
Sophia: I can't really answer that question, as I haven't lived in Britain while identifying as trans. I lived in Spain when I started my transition. As for Spain, it's not a bad place, at least where I was, in Barcelona, but there's definitely a lot of room for improvement. I hear the south of Spain is tougher, though.
Monika: Since you are now living in Germany, particularly in Berlin, how would you describe the state and visibility of the transgender movement there today?
Sophia: People often say that Berlin is like its own country, and well, it's the only place I can comment on anyway. The trans community is very strong there, with lots of support groups and resources. People in the leftist and feminist scenes tend to be aware of trans issues, expanding the areas where I feel comfortable. I think Berlin is just right for me right now. Unfortunately, the healthcare system hasn't caught up, and there are still really ridiculous requirements for trans people who want to access healthcare.
Monika: How do you assess the way transgender people have been portrayed so far in films, books, and the media more broadly?
Sophia: I think we have a looong way to go as far as representation is concerned. When a trans person is featured, they are almost always primarily a trans person, as if that is their main role in the story. Movies with trans protagonists are all about the protagonist being trans; you can never forget it for a moment. Newspapers put “transsexual person did this or that” in their headlines as if their being transsexual was the news itself. This constant framing reduces complex people to a single label.
Monika: Are there any examples of transgender representation that you feel come closer to what you would like to see more of in the future?
Sophia: My favorite trans representation so far is Sophia in Orange Is the New Black. Not because she is an amazing character, but simply because the fact that she is trans does not seem to be the absolutely central element of how she is shown. That kind of portrayal allows space for a character to exist as a full human being rather than a symbol.
Monika: Transgender issues are often discussed within the broader LGBT framework. From your perspective, does the transgender community have enough space and influence to advocate for its own concerns within these organizations?
Sophia: Frankly, most LGBT organizations are LGBT in name only; in truth, they stand up for lesbians and gays only. This is improving a bit, though; I was happy that the British charity Stonewall started expanding into advocating for trans rights and doing it in a fairly sensible way.
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| Sophia's blog (offline). |
Monika: Are you actively involved in politics, and do you participate in lobbying or advocacy work? How do you view the potential impact of transgender women in the political arena?
Sophia: I can't say that I am very much at the moment. I vote for the Green Party, which is about the best option as far as LGBT rights are concerned, plus a load of other things. Everyone can make a difference if they contribute, and of course, trans women have it harder in politics, but change is still possible and happening. Being aware and involved in even small ways feels important to me.
Monika: How central is love in your life, and how do your relationships shape your day-to-day experiences?
Sophia: I love love. I'm polyamorous and currently have a boyfriend, a girlfriend, and a lover besides, who also can't be classified as "just sex," even if she is not a full partner. It keeps me going; in particular, I get very hungry for physical contact if I go a long time without someone to cuddle. Love, in all its forms, gives me energy and emotional grounding.
Monika: Do you enjoy fashion, and what kinds of clothing or styles do you feel most drawn to? Are there specific colors or designs that resonate with you?
Sophia: I'm not hip enough to be able to name trends. I like long skirts and summer dresses and wish it were always summer so I could wear my favorite dresses. I love white and bright colors and cannot wear black. My favorite style is what they call in Spanish "Ibicenca," the Ibizan style. Very flowy, romantic, kind of hippie, and all in white, topped with a summer hat. Dressing this way helps me feel free and in tune with myself.
Monika: What are your immediate priorities right now, and where do you hope to see yourself in the next five to seven years?
Sophia: Self-care is key for me right now, as things have been very hard recently. I need to secure a stable income for myself, which I've neglected until now and paid the consequences. For the next year or two, all I can focus on is resting, improving my financial situation, and avoiding too many adventures. From there, I'd love to expand my writing projects and eventually earn a full living from them. I also have a board game I want to design. There is so much to do, I just need to find the energy to do it. Planning ahead gives me hope and direction.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender girls who are struggling with gender dysphoria?
Sophia: That's a big question. Hold on, I guess. Take care of yourself. Ration your energy. Transition is going to take a lot out of you. Remember that patience and self-compassion are as important as any practical steps you take.
Monika: Sophia, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences with me today.
Sophia: Thank you!
All the photos: Courtesy of Sophia Gubb.
© 2015 - Monika Kowalska
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