Monika: Today, I have the pleasure of interviewing Kayla Ward, a young American video blogger who has been documenting her transition on YouTube. Through her channel, Kayla shares the highs and lows of her journey, offering support and inspiration to countless viewers navigating similar paths. Her openness and honesty have made her a role model for many in the transgender community. Kayla, welcome to the interview!
Kayla: Hi, thanks for contacting me.
Monika: Could you say a few words about yourself?
Kayla: I am finally happy now that I can be on the outside who I have always been on the inside. I have been living full-time for a little over a year now and have loved every minute of it! Every day feels like a new opportunity to embrace life as my true self, and I wouldn’t trade this journey for anything.
Monika: Why did you decide to share your transition details on YouTube?
Kayla: I followed many girls like me for years and was inspired by their journey and wanted to share the same inspiration with others. I know how important it is to see someone going through the same experiences, and if my story can help even one person feel less alone or more confident in their path, then it’s all worth it.
Monika: At which stage of the transition are you right now?
Kayla: Everything is done but SRS and that is soon.
Monika: Are you satisfied with the results of the hormone therapy?
Kayla: More than satisfied. I didn’t expect things to change as much as they have. Not just physically, but emotionally as well. I finally feel at peace with myself in a way I never thought possible. It’s amazing how aligning my body with my true self has brought me so much confidence and happiness.
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| Fall Fashion. |
Monika: Could you tell me about your childhood? When was the first time you realized that you were not meant to be a boy?
Kayla: I first felt out of place when I was about five years old. I didn’t have the words to explain it, but I knew deep down that something didn’t feel right. I hated who I was but was too afraid to tell anyone, so I kept it all inside. Instead of expressing my true feelings, I threw myself into sports as a way to distract myself. Playing sports gave me a temporary escape, but no matter how hard I tried, that feeling of not belonging never went away. Looking back, I wish I had been able to talk to someone about what I was going through, but at the time, I just didn’t know how.
Monika: For many transgender women, school, college, or university can be the most challenging time due to bullying and discrimination. Did you experience the same difficulties?
Kayla: I wasn’t out during that time, so I never faced that kind of discrimination directly. I tried my best to blend in and avoid attention, but deep down, I felt like I was hiding a huge part of myself. I did lose a few friends after I came out, but I also gained many others who accepted me wholeheartedly. Looking back, I wish I had been able to live as my true self earlier, but I’m grateful for where I am now.
Monika: Are there any transgender role models that have inspired you?
Kayla: Absolutely! There are so many incredible women who have paved the way for people like me. Candis Cayne was one of the first trans actresses I ever saw on television, and she showed me that it’s possible to live authentically and successfully in the public eye. Carmen Carrera is not only stunning but also a fierce advocate for transgender visibility in the fashion industry. Isis King inspired me early on with her confidence on America’s Next Top Model, proving that trans women belong in mainstream media. Jamie Clayton is an amazing actress whose talent speaks for itself, and Laverne Cox has been a game-changer, using her platform to educate the world about transgender rights. Each of these women, in their own way, has given me the courage to embrace my journey.
Monika: What was the hardest part of coming out for you?
Kayla: Losing my wife. We had built a life together, and I truly loved her, but she couldn’t see herself in a relationship with a woman. It was heartbreaking, but I had to stay true to myself. At the same time, coming out also brought me a sense of freedom I had never felt before. Even though I lost some people along the way, I gained self-respect and a community that supports me.
Monika: How do you see the current situation for transgender women in American society?
Kayla: Major progress is happening, but there is still a long way to go. We see more representation in media, politics, and workplaces, but there are still many places where trans women face discrimination, especially in healthcare and legal rights. There’s a growing awareness, and younger generations are more accepting, which gives me hope for the future.
Monika: More and more transgender women are stepping into the public eye. Unlike in previous years, some are now celebrities or well-known figures—Lana Wachowski in film, Jenna Talackova in modeling, Kate Bornstein in academia, Laura Jane Grace in music, and Candis Cayne in acting. Do you think we will continue to see even more trans women rising to prominence?
Kayla: I absolutely do. In sports, movies, TV, and modeling, trans women are proving that we can succeed in any industry. There are lots of opportunities to be who we are and to be accepted, no matter what field we pursue. With more visibility comes more acceptance, and I think we’ll see even greater representation in the years to come. It’s an exciting time, and I’m hopeful that future generations of trans women will have even more role models to look up to.
Monika: Do you believe that within our lifetime, a transgender woman could become President of the United States?
Kayla: It’s possible, but I don’t think it will happen anytime soon. There are still too many barriers in politics and society, and unfortunately, a lot of prejudice still exists. However, as more trans people step into leadership roles, I do believe we’ll continue breaking down those barriers. Maybe not in our lifetime, but one day, I have no doubt it will happen.
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Monika: Do you enjoy fashion? What kind of outfits do you usually wear? Are there any specific designs, colors, or trends that you love?
Kayla: I absolutely love fashion and design! I’ve been lucky enough to have some wonderful friends who have helped guide me in finding my style and learning how to put together outfits that make me feel confident. I love feminine styles, dresses, skirts, and anything that makes me feel elegant. I’m also a big fan of soft pastels and floral prints, but I’ll never say no to a classic little black dress. Fashion has been such a fun way for me to express my identity, and I’m always looking for new ways to refine my look.
Monika: What are your thoughts on transgender beauty pageants?
Kayla: I think the women who participate in them are absolutely beautiful, and it’s wonderful to see transgender women being celebrated for their confidence and grace. However, I don’t think there should have to be a separation between transgender pageants and mainstream beauty pageants. Beauty is beauty, and I hope that one day, transgender women will be able to compete in all pageants without restrictions. Until then, I think these pageants are a great way to uplift and empower trans women.
Monika: Are you involved in your local LGBT community?
Kayla: There isn’t a big LGBT community where I live, but I have connected with some amazing people in Dallas. I’ve participated in a few events and met some incredible friends through those experiences. I’d love to get even more involved in advocacy and support work because I know how important community is, especially for transgender people who might feel isolated.
Monika: Do you hope to get married and have a family one day? How important is love in your life?
Kayla: I definitely hope to find love and get married one day. It’s something I think about daily because I’ve always dreamed of having a partner to share my life with. Love is such a powerful thing, and I believe that everyone deserves to find someone who sees them for who they truly are. While I’m happy with where I am now, I know that finding the right person would make life even more fulfilling.
Monika: What advice would you give to transgender women who are afraid to start their transition due to discrimination and hatred?
Kayla: More people will accept you and love you than you might think. It’s easy to focus on the negative stories and the fear of rejection, but there is so much support out there. When you are true to yourself and treat others with kindness, life opens up in some amazing ways. Surround yourself with people who uplift you, and remember that your happiness is worth fighting for. Transitioning isn’t easy, but it’s one of the most rewarding things you can do for yourself.
Monika: What’s next for you? Where do you see yourself in the next 5-7 years?
Kayla: The next big step for me is SRS! It’s something I’ve been working toward for a long time, and I’m so excited for this next chapter in my journey. In the long run, I’d love to see myself in the WNBA and living as a happily married woman. More than anything, I just want to continue living my life authentically and helping others along the way.
Monika: Could you say that you are a happy woman now?
Kayla: I am more than happy!!!
Monika: Kayla, it was a pleasure to interview you. Thanks a lot!
END OF PART 1
All the photos: courtesy of Kayla Ward.
© 2013 - Monika Kowalska
